OhMY!!!
Please let me explain as I owe you guys that much. It's no secret I've had problems with my son for a while.. (medically and behaviorally) or actually maybe I didn't let on that much about it. Those of you that are parents know that no matter how old a kid is...he's always your kid. Perhaps, because I've had this challenging child it made me more compassionate to others like him. I always seemed to be able to reach kids or animals that others had problems with..but ironically don't do so well with my own son. This causes me great pain. Of course I blame myself as most parents would. In a nutshell I question what I do wrong and one of the things I asked myself" perhaps I'm on the computer too much in the evenings?" Probably not so, as he's out with friends or I'm waiting up for him when I'm on, but still, after one particularly bad night I thought "that's it!" no more computer for me and pulled the plug so to speak. It was done on impulse and frustration as what to do on my part. After a while, I realized I needed you guys and this forum as it brings me great joy. I sat down, plugged everything back in and in true "marianne fashion" knocked over my entire cup of coffee over the keyboard rendering it useless". Please note I do believe kids when they tell me the dog ate my homework stories. Couldn't log on to the computer at school either, as all computers there need a password and for some reason mine hasn't worked at this new school. The head office has tried several times to get me logged on to no avail. Anyhow long story and it's only this evening I have logged back in and I truly apologize for not giving an explaination. I had no idea of the turmoil I caused and really appreciate your concern. My heart felt thanks to all of you and I am blessed to know so many wonderful people. Weird too as just when I thought I was losing the battle to get my son on the right track, he found himself a job!! I'm praying this will be a step in the right direction for him. Well that's it and even though I'm a bit embarressed to admit this much personal stuff about the problems with one of my kids I realize I need to stay here where I forget about the stress and can hang out with some pretty neat people. Marianne PS I'm now going to read all my emails as I haven't done that as yet either. |
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Sooo glad your back  As a mum of an 18 year old and 21 year old I can fully sympathise with you, we all go through it and it does seem to sort it self out.
Missed you, missed your great stories and just glad you are all OK.  |
| I'm only new here but I can totally understand what you are going through. One of my daughters was diagnosed with conduct disorder and we struggled to keep her on the straight and narrow. I remember the sleepless nights, staying up late and wondering what she was up to, the police phoning to get us to come and pick up up. Thankfully she is on the road to turning her life around.
It's great that your son has gotten himself a job, but as parents we have to learn that we can only do the best we can. Oops sorry to go like this Jean |
| Marianne,
It is ironic that this morning I received this e-mail. Stress Management A lecturer, when explaining stress management to an audience, raised a glass of water and asked, "How heavy is this glass of water?" Answers called out ranged from 20g to 500g. The lecturer replied, "The absolute weight doesn't matter. It depends on how long you try to hold it." "If I hold it for a minute, that's not a problem". "If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my right arm". "If I hold it for a day, you'll have to call an ambulance". "In each case, it's the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it gets." He continued, "And that's the way it is with stress management". "If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won't be able to carry on". "As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again". "When we're refreshed, we can carry on with the burden". "So, before you return home tonight, put the burden of work down. Don't carry it home. You can pick it up tomorrow. Whatever burdens you're carrying now, let them down for a moment if you can". "Relax; pick them up later after you've rested". "Life is short. Enjoy it!" I have spent most of my life taking care of others. I have found that if I don't take care of myself, including mentaly and emotionally, I am no good for anyone. We all have our our problems. I have found the forum more than a place to talk about sheepdogs. It is a wonderful community in which to "escape". A place to laugh and share about our furry friends, but also a shoulder to cry on, and a support to carry on. So glad you are back. |
| Marianne, So glad you are back. Angel is right about stress. I copied it to keep in my purse. And happy your son got a job. Good luck to him.
Welcome back, I missed you, we all missed you. 
 |
| Jil breathes a HUGE sigh of relief!
Welcome back!!! |
Welcome back Marianne!  |
| Oh gosh!! Marianne!!! I'm so relieved to hear you're okay!! Thank goodness you're back with us!!! |
| YaaaaaaaaaaaHHHHHHH!!!!!
You're Back. Praise the Lord. |
| HOORAY!!!
Marianne is BACK!!! I'm so glad for the update and so glad you are back online. Surely there has to be a way to fit this in without jeopardizing things with your son. . . . If it means you aren't on as often or can't provide the tremendously detailed and thoughtful responses, that's OK! I am just really grateful for whatever experiences you have time to share. Welcome back!! |
| Marianne,
We are so glad you are back .
Life will sort itself out.. it always does, especially when you have your friends around. Brenda, Dudley and Murphy |
| YAY MARIANNE IS BACK!
I'm so glad you came back. Thanks for sharing with us why you left. As a mom of 4 littler ones, I dont know yet what you are going thru with your son, but I can empathize on feeling like a mom. So glad you are back. HUGS! |
| You scared us. Sooo glad you're back. My kids are only 3 & 4, and I already stress out so much over them that I'm scared of the teenage years, lol I'm glad he got a job. |
| Marianne,
So happy you're back! I'm sorry for the rough times you are going through. Kids are hard (although my only experience was being one!) and I know that even though my brothers and I were pretty good kids, my mom was worried all the time too and sat up late and waited for us, so I can only imagine with a kid that has some troubles. Good luck, and I'm glad you're back! |
| Marianne,
Sooooo glad you are with us again 
Diane & The 3 Shaggies...Brody, Beebles, Cassie Atlanta, GA |
| Glad you came back We have missed you Marianne
Kim & MAIZE |
Awwww Mulligan knew you were fine all along. 
His daddy on the other hand....  |
| YEA!!!! I'm so glad you are back and okay, Marianne. Life throws us curve balls and hard times...it's supposed to make us better people. Although we don't welcome difficult times, I suppose it makes us better by being able to have more empathy for others in need. I'm sorry you are having some troubles at home. Thank you for sharing your personal life with us. We understand if you can't chat with us as frequently or as in depth to attend to personal matters. Glad you're here!!! |
First, Marianne - WELCOME BACK!!  We are all so relieved that you are okay.
Second - your first priority has to be your son. We've all been through hard times with our kids and understand fully what you're going through. Just know that when life gets to be too much for you, you can always come here and vent and get support.
Third - DON'T EVER SCARE US LIKE THAT AGAIN!!!
Chris |
Drezzie's Mom wrote: Third - DON'T EVER SCARE US LIKE THAT AGAIN!!! Chris That goes double for me!
Jil |
| Welcome back Marianne! I'll keep sending positive thoughts for you and your son. |
| so glad your back
einy and i send lots of luck anf sheepie hugs your way zoe and einy |
| Welcome back, Marianne.
Sad you left  but glad you're back |
| Good thing your back Marrianne, and we were so close to putting on America's most cyber wanted...you did scare everyone with the abruptness.
Everything will be okay with your son, I hope he finds some passion in this new job, and a good boss. |
| First off...DONT EVER DO THAT AGAIN
Okay, now I can say..thank God youre okay. Im glad youre back. Trust me when I say I know what youre going through...My stepdaughter as lovely as she is has had some really BIG issues. If you want to talk pm me...I have found that bouncing frustrations and ideas off of friends helped tremendously. Remember also, that as a parent, there is only so much you can do. He is old enough to make decisions for himself...which when you think about it can be VERY scarey. But with that said, just remember what my mother told me...."I did the best that I knew how at that time...If I could turn back the clock, would there be things that I change..of course..but there is no course book on parenting. You just do your job and do it to the best of your ability...Thats all anyone can ask." xoxo..Glad your back |
See? Didn't I call shennanigans on this in the first place? 
Glad you're back! Jill |
Quote: First off...DONT EVER DO THAT AGAIN
Darcy took the words right out of my mouth. You had some of us scared that something bad had happened to you. Glad to hear that your son is getting back on the right track. My parents tell me all of the time, you never do stop raising your kids, no matter how old they are. I was a horrible teenage, as a child of 2 educators how did I manage to get kicked out of high school? We all make choice in life, some good, some bad but like the saying goes "What doesn't kill us, only makes us stronger". Welcome back, we missed you very much. |
| Marianne,
Glad your back! [/quote] |
| Oh Marianne! Welcome back!! It has to really touch your heart that so many of us were worried about you. I think we come to expect to see certain one post regularly. When I was a kid, I heard my mom and her brother talking about being parents. He said to her, when can we stop worry about these kids. And being a very wise woman, my mom said, "Not til they throw the first shovel of dirt on our coffins!" Having a 20 and 21 year old I now understand. And I think we all have guilt about how we raised our kids, or the amount of time we give them. Somehow I suspect, you never have to feel guilty about that. You have a such a loving heart, and I bet your a great mom!!!!! Deborah |
| MARIANNE Glad you came back with an explanation! ...especially since you didn't HAVE to but again.. always prove/show how much you care about us. ((HUGS))) |
| Glad to hear you're back and safe! |
| So glad you are back, Marianne!!! The longer we didn't hear from you the more concerned we became. Thanks for coming back and letting us know that you are okay. I'm sure things will work out in time with your son, especially if you have your forum friends to help you through it.
Saulmr, love your new avatar. Did Danita have anything to do with it???  |
| Welcome back!
It looks like we have to start a cyber buddy up program so that everyone will be able to account for their cyber buddies on this wild field trip. You know where we are if you need us!!! |
| I know we ALL need you and your wisdom, so happy to learn we mean something to you too.
Hope your son's job works out and he's on his way. You will worry about him until the day you die, that's called being a mother. |
| Hi Marianne,
Thanks for checking in, so happy you are safe. Talk about a parenting group. We all took turns staying up late until you returned safely. Next time, just call home to say you are going to be late
Taking away your cell phone and computer privilages, we're sending you to the Day Spa for rest and relaxation! |
| Marianne,
I am so glad to see that you are back! We were all so worried. Welcome Back! We missed you very much! |
| yeahhhhh your back we've all been so worried about you please dont do that again |
| Hmmm you know reading these post I had to think "What's wrong with that picture?". Yikes! I took away my own computer priveledges in my attempt to grasp at straws! Thanks so much to each and every one of you for your support and concern!
Gosh time for a group hug as I feel so much love in the room! 
Marianne |
| Missed you sister!!!! |
| Maryann,
I'm so glad you are ok. Its a rollercoaster ride with any teenagers. Sometimes they make you question your sanity. Just when you wonder where you went wrong they do something to make you proud. If your sons out it shouldn't matter if your on the computer because its not taking time away from him.Don't be so hard on yourself |
| Hey thanks for that you guys.
Ginny gave me a great suggestion and told me I should print out the responses from you guys and read them when I feel down. I really am overwhelmed with the support I got from you guys. Thanks to all of you and it's sooooo gooood to be back. I need you guys and won't be leaving again unless I happen to spill coffee on the keyboard or something. speaking of which I picked up a new/old keyboard at the second hand shop for the hefty price of 99 cents!!! Marianne |
| BAD MARIANNE BAD GIRL!!!!!!hehe!!I am SOOOOOO glad your ok(note too self IF I ever plan on leaving DONT say a word too anyone!!!! )hehe!! Marianne I want too say please dont ever feel embarassed for what your child does as an adult.My issues w/ my soon too be 18yr old daughter are VERY simialar too yours w/ your son,i know I have done everything too keep her on the right path,however she has choosen too go another way.I KNOW you ahve done the very best you can do,so please dont blame yurself. I am so glad your back who else writes mini novels on freeing a wild rat???Come on we are ALL waiting on a good Marianne story I like too call a good feeling story I hope you see how nurotic we all are,and how much we need you to keep us together,so PLEASE dont ever say goodbye too us again OR ELSE!!!!LMAO!!I sound like a stalker!!hehe!! YAY!!!!!!MARIANNE IS BACK!!! |
| Ummm Tanya,
You did leave and not say a thing to anyone..... You were gone for quite a while. We were worried about you too. |
| Yup, I agree!
Whenever anyone on this forum goes AWOL I worry. I should have known better to do that myself. Me |
| Marianne, you DID say something. It's just that what you said was very vague and not at ALL like you. That's probably why we all worried.
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| WHEW! Glad you're back, you certainly had the chat room buzzing with speculation We even agreed that if something terrible had happened you would need us, as we need you to be here for us.
WELCOME HOME |
| Glad to have you back Marianne. We were all worried, but I tried to imagine that you had run of to build your Ark and that there was no electricity there yet. I too am a mother of a child that has "gone astray" and caused his mother great anguish. Just when you think you could string them up by their ummmmm, well you know, they do something that just surprises you. Hang in there girlfriend, if you kill them you just go to jail. I did have a police officer tell me though, that once they reach eighteen you can no longer get in trouble for child abuse, they call it domestic violence. Good luck. We are keeping you all in our prayers. |
| Yeah im guilty as well BUT I had an awesome reason why I left.........IT was summer!! This summer I will be missing again,but I do check back once a week.I dont recall anyone sending me an email asking where i was  LOL!!Im just glad Your back,i really enjoy you!! |
| The posts you've received, prove without doubt
Its more than puppy love, that this forums about. Through good times and bad, though we're far and near We offer our hearts, and lend our open ear. We're different yet alike, for we each suffer pain Our friendship and support, is what we offer and gain. We can pull the plug, and stay away from the site But from within these hearts, we can never take flight. Welcome home Marianne! From your friend, Pam |
| That was lovely, Pam. |
| Aww Pam...thats so nice! |
| I told Pam she is incredibly gifted with her talent of poetry - you have definately found your niche her Pam as the official resident poet. It was truly beautiful. Thank You!
Marianne and the boys |
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