Harley Update - Lung Cancer or a Fungi Infection
Harley either has Lung Cancer or a Fungi Infection. I spoke with my SIL who is familiar with the Fungi. She said every dog that she knew of that had it died even with treatment. The treatment for Fungi would be VERY expensive with no guarantees. It could also cause liver and or kidney damage. We had blood taken for the specific Fungi test. Another $120. We are up to $1000 now. We will not have the results until next Thursday. The test takes 4 days and the lab is not open on the weekends. He is coughing because his entire left lung is covered in these nodules (either Fungi or Cancer) He is only breathing with the good part of the right lung. (Right lung also is 1/3 covered in nodules. The Dr said if it is Cancer he is too far gone for treatment. At the most he only has a couple of weeks left. I asked to see the X-rays and one of the nodules looked like the size of an egg. I don't even know if Harley will make it until the test results get back. I don't know what else to say |
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| Oh Elissa, that's such terrible news.
You'll know what is right to do when the time comes, to keep your boy comfortable. Weekends are terrible. Give him an extra rub for me, and one for Joan, too. If you can, sneak in a hug. |
| Elissa --
I am so so so sorry. That is such scary and sad news. These terrible conditions can just pop up out of nowhere. It is awful coming to terms with the possibility of a pet being stricken down out of the blue. I am sure Harley knows you are doing everything you can for him. Please give him a kiss and a gentle caress from me. . . I'll be thinking of you both and hoping there has been a terrible mistake. . . .  |
| Thanks Ron, Joan & Val,
He just threw up his antibiotics and all the food he ate for dinner. I just pet his head and scratched his ears for you. He looked up at me with this pathetic look and moaned. This is so hard. Billy is a mess. He is so upset about his doggy. Harley is sitting at my feet. The receptionist at the Vet said he looked depressed. He does. I feel so bad...especially since we have to wait until next week to get the results. I really wish I knew if he was in pain. I don't want him to suffer. But being that he only has use of one lung I have to think that he IS in pain. I need to go take lie down. All this stress has not been good for me. I have been sick to my stomach all day. |
| So sorry to hear about Harley. Hopefully it is a mistake if not, you'll know what is best for him. No matter what, keep him happy and give him extra scratches for all of us.
We'll all be here for you come rain or shine! Good luck!!! |
| So sorry Elissa..... I know you had hoped for a better outcome....
Whatever decision you and Billy make will be the best one.... *hugs* Only you can know what is best.... |
| Oh elissa I am in tears reading this post, my heart goes out to you, your family and Harley, such an awful time, I know it is hard with not so good news but stay strong and positive for harley and your family.
Love to you all at this stresssful time and belly rubs and kisses for harley.  |
| Elissa,
I'm so sorry the news today wasn't good. I just want you to know that your in my thoughts. |
Pepsi's Mommy wrote: I really wish I knew if he was in pain.
I don't want him to suffer. But being that he only has use of one lung I have to think that he IS in pain. If it is helpful, I would add that I'm not convinced that a blocked/ restricted lung is necessarily painful. I would expect him to feel fatigued and in low spirits. . ..At least over the weekend, will you have more time to spend with him? Sorry, trying to look at the bright side of a terrible situation. It reminds me very much when my poor kitty Chia was stricken with cancer last year. I was grateful that I had broken my foot (if you can believe that) because that meant I got to work from home for a bit and spend time with her before she succumbed. . . This really sucks. |
| I'm so sorry, Elissa. We were all hoping for a better outcome. All our love go out to you and your family. I wish I could take the pain away. XOXOXO |
| Oh Elissa, Im so sorry for Harley....Im about to cry..I missed you in the chat...Ill call you later today..kisses to Harley.. |
| I am so sorry to hear this.
People and pets can live with one lung. It happens in humans more often than you think. They usually compensate by taking a deeper breath with the remaining lung. Soemtimes they get supplemental oxygen. It can be tiring, but is not usually painful. The depression can be due to less oxygen reaching the brain. It is a common side effect of lung cancer seen in humans. |
| This is tragic, so very sad. One lung and damaged at that, trying to support the dog, of course he's "depressed" he just doesn't have the energy. Still he knows you love him and he loves you. They don't question why this happened like we do, they just deal with what they have. While it's hard not to be depressed when you are around him, try to do things with him that bring both of you pleasure. They sense our moods.
I'm so sorry this didn't turn out better. sheepieboss |
| tears are in my eyes as i read this im so soory the news isnt better we all here for you give harley belly rubs from boo and the gang |
| Well Harley seems to be coughing more
He spent a majority of the day with his Daddy out front working on the new family truckster. He loves hanging out with Daddy. He did not touch his food this morning. I figured because of last night with him throwing up after taking his pills, that I would break the capsules open and mix that with the canned food, then give him his other 1 1/2 pills before he ate. I don't know if he just wasn't hungry or he knew that I put the medicine in there. For Dinner Harley got to eat a Rib Eye Steak. Boy did he enjoy that. He even made a slight happy noise. I really wish there was something I could do for him. I will elaborate more on what the Vet said. She asked if we had been to Arizona recently (This type of Fungi is prevalent there). I said last summer but Harley was not with us. She thinks the nodules on his lungs are either Cancer or a Fungi known as Coccidioidomycosis a.k.a Valley Fever. If it was on a bone it would be easier to detect. She said that Cancer will not cross a joint, but the Fungi would. Now we just have to wait until the tests come back. But with both the Cancer and Fungi being that he is not under any treatment besides antibiotics he might not make it until the results come back. This is so scary that this has happened so quickly. In just a matter of weeks. He went from being fine to this. He was fine...other than a little lazy before we left for vacation. I thought it was his hips. In the meanwhile we will be giving Harley lots of extra hugs, kisses & love Thank you to everyone for caring so much!!! |
| Elissa, I am so sorry to hear about the problems that Harley is having....What makes me feel better and not so helpless is information...I know that sounds probally like a stupid remark....But, the more I understand the better decisions I can make pertaining to the health of the Babies....Sorry, I'm not preaching to you.......I have 4 OLD BABIES here with me with different medical Problems....I'm just saying what works for me .......Knowledge is Freedom!!!! |
| Sorry to hear about Harley's results. I'm hoping that he will be the miracle boy and defy all of the odds against him.
~VerveUp (Deb) |
| Hi Elissa-
I'm so sorry that you didn't receive the news we all had hoped for. It always hurts to get this kind of diagnosis. You're doing the very best you can for him... I can tell from your post you're making whatever time he has extra special. Please give him a hug for me. |
| I've been reading and hoping for the best for you. Give Harley all the steaks he wants, and hopefully you get some good news, or a treatment for him. Otherwise enjoy your time, and just make him comfortable. I'm so sorry that you and the family are having to go through this, but we are all here to listen and send our prayers to Harley. |
| Oh, Elissa, I'm so sorry to hear about poor Harley and for what you and your family are going through. As everyone has said, you will know in your heart when the time is right to make that hard decision. In the mean time, just love and enjoy him as much as you can. My heart aches for you, friend.
Chris |
| Elissa-
I'm so sorry to hear about Harley Having a sick boy myself I know how difficult it is, waiting for test results makes you crazy. Keep postive thoughts because you never know what will work. Allfingers and paws crossed for good news-
Holly |
| So sorry to hear about Harley. I kept waiting and waiting before I said anything in hopes for better news. Good luck. Hugs from me, Clyde and Lucy.
Jill |
| i just read the news, i am so sorry elissa!
were hoping for a miracle over here! please give harley an extra hug from walter and me. |
| I'm so sorry to read about Harley Elissa.You and Harley and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. He's lucky to have you to care for him.Dogs bring so much joy but so much pain when something is wrong with them. It's heartbreaking. I don't know what else to say. I wish I could make it better but I know I can't. Hugs to you all |
| Oh no.
I'm so sorry Elissa.
Hug him, kiss him, spoil him. |
| Oh, Elissa, I'm so sorry. This is not what I was expecting to hear at all
I hope you get the results back quickly and that there is something you can do. We're thinking of you. |
| Thanks again to everyone for caring so much about Harley. My family really appreciates all the love and support everyone has shown us.
Unfortunately he seems to be getting worse. He looks like he lost more weight despite us giving him everything under the sun. The Vet said she didn't care what we gave him as long as he is eating. Last night he got some pepperoni pizza. Tonight Rib Eyes again. He didn't seem to mind that at all. I picked up some Colloidal Silver as per Kaye's suggestion (Thanks Kaye) and gave him a double dose this evening. I will continue to give this to him until his results are back. It is basically an all natural anti-biotic that even fights fungal infections. Looks like another 3 days of waiting for results. My mind is not there. I can't think of simple words. This stress has really taken it's toll on me. I am going to give Harley some hugs and kisses now and try to take my mind off of things |
| So sorry to hear about Harley. |
| *hugs* This must be so hard on all of you.... how are hubby and kids doing? |
| Billy is having a really hard time with this, Harley is his buddy. Ryan was crying the other night after I explained that Harley is really sick and probably won't be with us much longer.
I rescued Harley for him almost 4 yrs ago. I remember the night I went to get him. My Brother In Law called as soon as we got back from a 300 mile Motorcycle trip to Laughlin. We were beat. He said that he finally got his ex to agree to give up the dog and I should go immediately. It was a 4 hr trip. 2 hrs each way. Billy was way to tired to go and someone had to stay with Ryan so I went. I didn't want Harley to spend one more day in that house. Harley was all over the car, front seat, back seat, front seat, back seat. I talked to him the whole way home. I was a bit nervous because I did not know him or his personality. When we got home I realized just how thin he was (59lbs)....and smelly. He had been left outside for god knows how long. The first thing we did was give him a bath. Then when we went to sleep Billy slept holding Harley's collar keeping him next to him. From then on that is where he stayed every night, right by Billy. He quickly became a part of the family. Billy tied him out front with him a couple of times while he worked on his car. He then decided Harley wouldn't go anywhere and stopped tying him out there. Harley would stay right there. Usually enjoying the cool pavement of the garage. To this day Harley is always out there with Billy when he works on on Vehicle. Within 3 months of having Harley he was up to an ideal weight for him of 98 lbs. He was a happy dog even though Peanut was trying to hump him all the time 
He caused some problems when I was pregnant, like eating a full size bed and box spring and the custom comforter on our King Size bed. We knew it was most likely a reaction to my changing hormones. When Hayley was born it was love at first site for Harley. He offically became a Nanny. Every time Hayley would cry Nanny Harley would come running to check on her. He would usually make it to the bassinet before me. Now he comes over and sits next to her, she doesn't sit very often because she's crawling but he still feels the need to check up on her. When I get up in the morning Harley is by my side when I got to get her in her room. Hayley is trying to say Doggie now and looked at Harley and said "Dodo"...lol That pretty much sums up Harley's personality too. We love him but he has always been dumber than a box of rocks. Well I am going to try to get him to eat. |
| Such a sweet story, Elissa. I know this is a hard time for all of you. Harley was so fortunate to have such a loving family that he bonded with. |
| Such a macho looking guy on the outside, so tender on the inside. |
Quote: We love him but he has always been dumber than a box of rocks.
But a heart of gold and a wonderful companion. 
Yeah... you've got me crying in front of the computer. Thanks for sharing his story with us. Hugs to you, your family and Harley. |
| What a nice story elissa. You've given him a good home a lots of love and he sounds like he couldn't have been happier (I can't believe he gained 40 pounds in 3 months!). I'm so sorry he's sick, but he's had a good second chance home. |
| (((BIG hugs to your family - both 4 legged and 2 legged) |
| He's so lucky to have spent his life with your family, Elissa! I love that you can keep happy thoughts of him in the front of your mind.
(((Big Hugs)))) You're in my thoughts! |
| I called the Vet thinking maybe Harley's results were back.
I guess the lab was open over the weekend. The results came back today. It is not a Fungi infection. The Vet is not going to be around Thursday or Friday and they are closed this weekend. So we either put him down tomorrow or wait until Monday. Other option is we go to another Vet for the euthanasia. The last thing we want is to have him suffering. The Vet said we could give his Prednisone for pain. Billy is in denial.... he wants to see Harley's X-rays. I saw them and it was not a pretty site. Hopefully Billy will snap out of this. He does not want Harley to suffer and I have to make him see that he is suffering. I feel like I am the bad guy now. Boy does this suck!!! |
| Elissa and family, god bless you all and harley,so sad the results were not good, feel so sad for you all and such a hard decision to make
Hugs and blessings |
| Im sorry Elissa.....Poor Billy....It has to be really hard on him..he knows that you are not the"bad" guy....he's just hurting too...you'll do whats right and Billy will too!!! {{{{hugs}}}}to you both |
| Elissa,
I have been avoiding this thread because I myself, am weak at times like this, so remain emotionally in denial as long as possible to avoid facing it. It brings back the vet trip I made with my own German Shepherd, Shelby, years ago. I remained very calm and serious throughout it, refusing to give in to emotions, and my hubby bawled his eyes out all the way home. One of you needs to be strong, and sounds like that is you. Hubby needs you as much as Harley does, to get through this. It is hard for them to take it, the helplessness of it all. You will get through it, because you have to, and he needs to lean on you right now. My sincerest sympathies. |
| Elissa, This just breaks my Heart...As many times as I have been in this situation I still don't have the answer...... Just hold on to him and Love Him...The Predisone will make him feel better... That will give you both and Him some more time.....He Will Tell You When It Is The Time..... Sheepie Hugs, Kaye Second Chance OES Rescue |
| I'm so sorry, Elissa. I was so hoping this was a fungal infection. You are being strong for everyone and will know the right thing to do. I've never had to make this type of decision so I don't have any wonderful advice to give you. All I can give you is reassurance that we are thinking of you and love you very much! |
Elissa, how very sad.  You will know when it's time to make the final drive. Billy will come around, he's just in denial right now. You are so wonderful for being the strong one in the family for this. My thoughts and prayers are with you in this time of need.
Chris |
| Elissa im so sorry to hear this i was really hoping that things would turn out ok but it sadly hasent. Thinking of you and billy at this really sad time. as everyone has said you know when the time comes again thinking of you and sending boo hugs your way. We are all here for you. |
| Elissa and Billy,
Harley will let you know when it is time...there will be no mistaking that look. I am SO sorry it has come to this. Poor Harley, at least he will no longer be suffering, and you two have to remember the good times with Harley and be proud you were such a loving family to him after he had such a bad start in life. Hugs |
| Thank you everyone. You all have been such a wonderful support system for me. and my family. We have no definite plans on when we will put him down. I am going to try to leave that up to Billy. Pepsi is trying to play with Harley right now and Harley bit him hard as to say Leave me alone. He is actually barking right now looking at me as if he wants to tell me something. This is the first time I have heard him bark this much since before Christmas. He just stopped and is out of breath and whining.
My poor guy! I think the other two know he's sick, that is why they keep going after him. I took a picture of him yesterday. He looks so sad. 
I changed my Avatar to show what Harley looked like in his prime. Look at the look of concern he has in the recent pic. You can also see the weight loss around his neck area. In the Avatar picture the color is different too. It was taken a couple of years ago while we were having all thos wildfires in CA the sky was an odd color. |
| Elissa,
I am so very sorry for you and Billy. It is a difficult decision to make. Harley is a beautiful, regal looking boy... if he is suffering.. you be the strong one and tell Billy.. "it's time", he may need someone other then himself to make the decision. We will be thinking of you and your family. Brenda. |
| OMG, Elissa, his eyes are SO sad - it's breaking my heart. I can't imagine how hard this is for you, seeing him like this. Hugs all around, friend.
Chris |
| Elissa, I am so sorry, I was hoping you would get better news Harley then and now is a handsome guy. |
| I agree, someone needs to be strong, and make tough decisions. Seeing you go through all this, I am sure it has helped somewhat to face it better, and Billy is seeing it from his point of view...his dog is sick, and he is not there at every vet visit, seeing results etc. He still has hope.
So sorry and my heart goes out to you and the family. Give Harley a hug from me and Remy, and Ziva. |
| Elissa,
I am so sorry to hear about Harley, I'm sitting at my desk with tears in my eyes. Hugs and Kisses from me and Bunker. Chelsey |
| It is amazing what Prednisone can do. Harley is acting like himself again.
Even barking. The Vet tech basically said it will make Harley feel like Superman. The biggest problem is this furthered Billy's denial. I finally picked up his X-rays yesterday for him to see. He broke down last night crying and admitted that we needed to put him down. He then said that he wanted to get another dog right away. I told him I was already working on that. My parents were here yesterday on their way back from a trip to Laughlin and Dad told him that he really needed to do this asap. He said "What if Ryan walked into the room and found Harley dead?" I think this made a lot of sense to him. I contacted the local ASPCA and they said they could put him down for $10 versus $160 at the Vet...We would also be able to bring him home. He will be buried in his favorite spot in the backyard. Our neighbor, a cabinet maker wants to build him a coffin. Is that weird??? I am thinking that will we do this sometime early next week. |
| no i dont think it is weird i think that is a great thing to do everytime we have lost a pet it has always been buried in our garden. my aunt when she lost he beloved poodle she buried it in her garden and made a really nice plot covered in shells and a picture including a headstone the works it helped her grieve. |
| Each of our dogs is buried in our apple orchard. I wish we had coffins as .......this is hard to type and read.......but when dead they are so floppy and it seems like we are just tossing out trash. We try very hard to be gentle, wrap the dogs in blankets, but those final adjustments are so hard.
Anyway, our vet is great.......she comes to the house and put the dogs down here, next to their burial site. Everyone cries. This is a hard time for you and your family. My deepest condolences. |
| So hard for you all elissa, I was like billy 6 months ago, kept thinking a little bit longer etc. My family had to convince me the time was right too. I had to finally accept it with a lot of convincing from my husband, that it was the right thing to do. At the time I was a mess and felt guilty but as time goes on you look back and know you really did the right thing for them and helped them go peacefully in their time of need.
We had Peppa cremated and she is up at the holiday farm in a little box in the ground with a sheepie statue & a little tree planted there as a memorial for her. As this was the place where we had the most wonderful times with her and when we go there I feel like she is watching over us at our happy family place in the countryside. Hugs to you all |
| I agree, Elissa, it's a great idea to bury him at home in his favorite spot in a coffin your neighbor built.
Last year when I had to put my Pumpkin down, I left work after talking to the vet because I was crying so hard I couldn't do anything else. I drove to my parent's house to tell them what had to be done (they loved her too!) and to ask them to go with me. My brother came in and by the look on my face, he just knew. He just hugged me and said, "I'll go start building her a coffin." It was the kindest, sweetest thing he could've done for me. Without any measurements, he built it perfectly to suit her. While my parents and I were at the vet's office, he dug her grave for me. When we returned, we all gathered and said goodbye to her. She's at my parent's house because it is the "family" property that in my life time, at least, will never be sold. I had a marble marker made for her, too. I still miss her, but I realise now that I did the best I could for her. Billy will realise that soon, too. My thoughts and prayers are with you & your family. |
| I think it's a wonderful idea to bury him someplace close, or a pet cemetary. I can't do that here, since we have a small yard, and you always worry about the next owners acidently digging a hole, and not knowing our pet lies there. I would most likely leave him/her to be cremated, and then spread the ashes at the dog park, or in the backyard.
It's great too that he wants another dog, it will help to have something fresh and new. But I hope he gives himself time to grieve and not compare harley to the new pup...if you know what I mean. Again very sad to go through all of this, glad he gets to feel a little better with the prednisone...he will alwys be in your hearts, and memories. |
| Dear Elissa,
Like everyone else, my heart is breaking for your Harley. It seems that you have so many hearts worrying with you...just look at the number of views for this post.... we who don't even know you and are from all over the world are feeling your sadness and watching for news of Harley. Long distance hugs to you and Harley. Aurelie xoxox |
| Elis...I bought a slate marker for my coworker and his family. They buried sammy in the yard as well...the marker is just beautiful...Orvis catalog...kisses again to you Billy and the kids..xoxo |
| Lots of hugs from us. Some type of memorial for Harley would be wonderful and would bring a sort of closure for the family. Memorializing him would be so wonderful. My Mom cremated Muffin and she forever remains in her china cabinet with pictures of her. Before building a casket, please make sure that you can bury him in your yard. Some towns prohibit this. I'm not sure how they'd find out, but...just in caee. Also, if you ever move you'd probably want to take him with.
There are some lovely memorials at www.carealotpets.com. This is a discounted pet supply company which I do get a catalog ever quarter. They have some lovely urns, caskets, stones, and keepsake boxes. XOXOXO |
Daisie wrote: It's great too that he wants another dog, it will help to have something fresh and new. But I hope he gives himself time to grieve and not compare harley to the new pup...if you know what I mean. That and the fact that a few months ago I had said no more shedding dogs we will not be getting another German Shepherd. We are in the process of rescuing Sheppie a 3 yr old OES. We will be rescuing him in honor of Harley's life. Aurelie wrote: Dear Elissa,
Like everyone else, my heart is breaking for your Harley. It seems that you have so many hearts worrying with you...just look at the number of views for this post.... we who don't even know you and are from all over the world are feeling your sadness and watching for news of Harley. Thank you I truly feel blessed to have all these wonderful friends who care so much! As for burying Harley, well technically it is against the law, but I am not telling anyone. We don't plan on moving anytime soon so I don't forsee any problems with that. Also our yard has a blockwall all the way around the backyard so I don't have to worry about neighbors digging. As for the grave marker, I had a beautiful one for Murray my cat. Thanks for the suggestions Darcy & Stacy. I will be looking into that. Hugs to Everyone! Thank you so much for your support! |
| Hi Elissa,
Apologies for only now catching up on what's been going on with Harley. In my pm to you I explained that ironcially I had a similar situation occur with me several years ago. I was misdiagnosed and told I had lung cancer due to the doctor finding nodules on my lungs. It turned out it was due to my years of clowning and applying baby powder to my face to set the makeup. Strange as tho it may seem, talcum powder contains silicone which resembles tiny stained glass on x-rays and caused nodules on my lungs from inhaling the talcum powder when I applied it on my face. I thought I should repeat myself here to warn people of the dangers, expecially to those with young children as in days past people often powdered their little ones behinds when they changed their diapers. I lost some lung capacity but it's not noticable to anyone and I still remain very active. Anyhow just thought I'd inform people out there about this. I'm so very sorry about Harley and always thought unlike Sheepies whom can be called "cute", GS can be called nobel and regal looking, like that of Harley in his photos. One of my favorite photos on the forum is one with Harley and Pepsi playing together where Pepsi is seen to appear to be flying in the air. He will be in your heart forever and saving another is a wonderful thing. Hugs to you all. Marianne |
| Oh Elissa, I just found this.......... I am so sorry . I had no idea you were going through all this over the past week. I am so very sorry. I did notice your avatar had changed but it has been a crazy week and I had only been making quick checks. What a very hard and difficult thing to go through, what a beautiful puppy! Hugs to all of you from all of us.
Ginny Tasker & Ty |
| Oh Elissa...I am so sorry! I just found this thread. The picture of Harley broke my heart, he looks so sad.
I will send all the positive energy your way for the rough week ahead. hugs Colleen |
| I too, just found this thread. Elissa, my heart goes out to you at this time. I know that Harley had a wonderful life with you. |
| Harley is a beautiful dog. His eyes do look sad or concerned in that picture. I think dogs really sense your emotions and with you being sad he might be picking up that somethings wrong and he's probably concerned for you. I know its hard to do but try to be happy around him and not cry . My heart goes out to you Harley and your family. I wish you didn't have to go through any of this. Its the part that sucks about having a dog. Hugs to all.
herbgirl |
| Thank herbgirl, Ginny, Marianne, Karen & Colleen
Billy finally called the Vet todat and spoke with her. She confirmed the only other thing that could have caused the nodules would have been a Fungi infection, which he tested negative for. She also told him that if we stopped the Steroids he would go downhill really quickly. Then Billy told me that he doesn't think he can be there and I should put Harley down without him  I told him he really should be there to say Goodbye |
| It really is such a difficult decision, then when and where. My heart goes out to you. |
| Elissa,
I am so very sorry to hear about Harley. It's just heartbreaking. I know it's different for each and every one of us when we lose a pet member of the family, but I wanted to encourage Billy to be there with Harley at the end, as hard as that is to do. We lost our 5 year old Sheepie, Quincy, unexpectedly, and the fact that he was with strangers when he passed away haunts me to this day. The last thing he should have felt when leaving this world was my touch, and the last thing he should have heard was my voice. Please encourage Billy to go, as hard as it will be, as he may come to regret not being there. Again, I am so sorry for your troubles, and hope you can be at peace knowing that Harley's last years were in a loving family. Laurie |
| I'm so sorry this is happening, Elissa. I would say, though, you obviously know Billy best and you know if he truly would want to be there with Harley. I know I wouldn't want to go, so don't push him if you feel he doesn't want to do it. |
| Elissa, I am so sorry for your family for having to go through this. Harley is a much loved member of the family, and so I can understand Billy's not wanting to be there for his final moments. But if you have any inkling that he will regret this decision in time to come, I would also gently encourage him to be there. Don't push him if he resists, just encourage.
I was there when we put our beloved Buford down, and I will never forget it. My reasoning was - he was as much a part of our family as any human member, and you wouldn't leave a human family member alone in the hospital to die, would you? Whatever you decide to do, you're in my thoughts and prayers. Chris |
| In my (not so) humble opinion, please don't force Billy to be there if he doesn't want to be there.
Everyone deals with this stuff in their own way. When it was Jake's time, they prepped him out of our view and brought him back to us. We said our goodbyes and I stepped out of the room and Joan stayed with him. As for humans, I sat with my mother like a vigil, overnight every night for 6 weeks, while the rest of my family slept. All the while I was secretly praying that I not be there at the moment she passed. She passed on after I left, while the rest of the family was there minutes after my father arrived. I don't regret either. |
| Hey Elissa. this must be such a trying time for you and your family... to be faced at once with the passing of one of your best friends, and to be experiencing the joy of a new one. I remember when we put our Eve down, my dad had to take her in by himself, my mom couldn't bear to be there when she passed. I understand where Ryan is coming from. Our thoughts and prayers are with you as come to this point. All our love,
Karen, Mike and the kitty girls. |
| Hi Elissa .
First i'd like to say our thoughts are with you at this time. When i had to put my first oes down i was certain i couldn't be with him and my husband had to go with him to the vets.That was over 15 years ago.A week after he was put down i started having regrets about not been there when he needed me most .I still have those regrets today. Don't force Billy into being there but do make sure it is what he really wants. |
| So sorry about Harley but please don't push Billy into going if he does not want to. I have done it both ways at different points in my life and don't regret the decision in either case. He has to make this decision for himself. |
| I may be considered heartless, but I don't care to be a part of the whole death and grieving scenerio. Maybe it is because I don't want to face it, but I don't care to see my loved ones pass on, unless they want me to be there. I would rather have my good memories, and remember them as happy and healthy. I think that being there until the end would haunt me. I have either sent my husband to do it or I go but not to the very end. I guess I am a wimp. I can totally relate to Billy. |
| I know it is no small thing to lose a special friend...My sincere sympathy to you and your family and to Harley in these difficult days. As the others have stated whether to be there or not is really a personal choice and really should be up to the individual. I never thought that I myself would ever have the courage to be there when any of my pets died or had to be put down. I just knew that when the time came I wanted to be there. I wanted the last thing that they heard on this earth to be my voice, the last touch they felt to be my touch, the last smell that they had smelled to be my smell. And when the time drew near for them to have the needle administered I always told them how much I loved them and thanked them for letting me be there to watch them leave this world. Was it easy? No way, but I would not have wanted it any other way. They actually taught me that death is nothing to be afraid of. Five years ago my mom passed away from a long battle with cancer. All of the family was there at her bedside when she died. I happened to be stroking her face and telling her how much I loved her when she drew her last breath. I will always be grateful to her for giving me that last gift. I know that your husband will make the choice that is right for him.....just stand by him no matter what choice he makes, I am sure his heart is breaking. |
| Jackcjjc
Since not been able to be there when my first oes was put to sleep( and living with that regret) i was determined to be there with all the others that have since passed away. They have also taught me that death is nothing to be afraid of. I have just come back from my grans funeral today.She died last week from lung a disease.I was also with her holding her hand and telling her i loved her when she passed away and like you i will be ever grateful for having them last moments with her. |
| Sixpence, My condolence at the loss of your Grans. |
| Thanks for all the advice... Ultimately I am leaving it up to Billy whether he wants to be there or not.
Julianne, I am very sorry for your loss |
| Thanks for your condolences.
What is cheering me up at the moment is i'm off to pick out my new pupster on saturday  |
sixpence wrote: What is cheering me up at the moment is i'm off to pick out my new pupster on saturday
YAY!!!! a new pup. |
| Only going to pick him out .
Can't pick him up till end of feb. I can't wait till the end of Feb im buying puppy things now.  |
| Still very exciting |
| What's cheering me up is that completely adorable picture of Hayley! What a happy girl! That is a great picture!! |
| Thanks Val
She had three shots at the Pediatrician and has a mild ear infection....yet she's still happy. |
| She is a DOLL! What a cutie! Her smile is contagious. |
| look at those cheeks! So cute! and a perfect little smile...almost makes me want to start thinking about one of those...almost.... |
| How precious is she!! And what an infectious grin!
Chris |
| Oh my goodness!! I just wanna squeeze her!! What an absolute DOLL!!! |
| Love the picture Elissa.
Hayley looks very cute |
| The picture of Hayley is so great! You can almost hear her giggle! |
| Thanks Everyone. Even when things get very hard to handle around here she keeps us smiling. I posted two pictures in the General Chit Chat
section in this thread. http://forum.oes.org/viewtopic.php?t=6426&start=15 |
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