Christmas without my OES

I'm new to this forum and I'm hoping it will help me get through this tough time. My OES passed away on 12-20-12 and I'm so lost without him. It was very unexpected. He was fine at breakfast and just after lunchtime, he was gone. The house is so quiet. We bought our house and a month later, rescued Ralf from the shelter. I don't know what it's like to live in this house without him. He was more than a dog, he was our kid. Our schedules revolved around him and he became very routine. Now when I do my routine things, he's not there with me. My heart hearts and my stomach is in knots. It's Christmas Day and I've spent most of it crying. If I didn't have my baby boy (he's 6 months old) and of course my husband, I don't know how I would get through the days. I can't shake this sadness.
RIP Ralf. You were an amazing friend and are missed more than you will ever know.

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Oh so sorry to hear of your loss. Welcome to the forum and glad you posted. Our members here have been through it all and are so supportive. Whatever happened, remember your baby was well loved by you and is happy and peaceful now at the Bridge...He will forever be your guardian doggy angel :hearts:

I'm sorry for your loss, but glad you found us. Yes, it is a sad day for you and you will be sad for a long time. That's the thing about grief--only time heals. But you have your baby to help you through this. And we have broad shoulders to cry on, too.

It hurts. It's a pain that never really disappears, but it does fade. You'll find yourself expecting him to be somewhere and he's not. You'll reach out to pet him, but he's not there. You have a husband and child, they are here, your sheepdog is also with you, in your heart. In time you'll be able to smile, not cry, as you think about him.

I am so sorry for your loss and know the pain is unbearable at this point. We lost a dog on Thanksgiving day four years ago and still celebrate with a tinge of sadness, although now we can think of the happy memories of her. You will get to that place eventually, too, but for now my heart breaks for you. We all know what you're going through.

That was my birthday.......I am so sorry for your loss. Most of us have been there and the pain in unbearable. They are your routine, your family, your heart. Take it one day at a time. That is the only way you get through. I still cry about losing Pooh Bear and I know alot of us agree with the tears that flow while remembering our furry friends. We adopted Angus 3 months after we lost Pooh Bear and called him Pooh for the longest time, still happens, but not as often. Don't be afraid to shed the tears. It helps in the healing process. It takes time and we are here for you.
:ghug:

I'm so sorry for your loss, it's so encompassing :cry:

Ralf had a wonderful life and he knew how much he was loved. That's the very best that his life could be. Know that he is still looking out for you. He led you here for help.

Hoping you stay with us for a time. You will find help and understanding here. :ghug:

You won't find a more supportive group, especially in a time of sorrow. It's so very safe to say that we've all been there and we all share your pain. I'll wager to say that many of those reading this thread are choked up, tearing up, both or more.

The pain will likely never go away but it will become a little easier to face as time goes on. If you're already thinking of another Sheepie, don't think of I as trying to replace Ralf as he cannot be replaced. But by getting another Sheepie, you can bet it will help fill the hole left in your heart, house and world. I'm sure if you want one and look, you can find another rescue that you'll grow to love as much as you did Ralf and they will grow to love you equally.

God speed Ralf. God speed buddy. When you get to the bridge, look for our big boy Bentley and so many others waiting.

Do stick around the forum as we all learn from each other.

Vance, Jen, Zoey and Caitlyn

So very very sorry for your loss. My heart hurts for you and understand your pain. It is hard and this time of the year especially hard to lose such a special furry friend. Like others have said--the pain is intense right now--but will get better yet never really goes away but the sweet memories will help the pain to fade.

Today we were watching some old home movies and on the screen came our Sherman who we loved over 20 years ago. There were a few tears in the room- mine and most of the family-even after all these years. Each one lives in your heart forever. :hearts:

Welcome to the forum, glad you are here. :ghug:

So sorry for your loss, we have lost 2 sheepies in the past and now have our 3rd, he's 3 years old and I am really hoping he outlasts us. The pain is real, you'll never forget Ralf but another can make things better, they have a lot of love to give to their humans.

the pain hurts but it will get better our Poem "Rainbow Bridge " gives us a lot of comfort :ghug:

we lost our Jade this time of year 3 years ago she was our rescued girl who we got at 8 years she had been though so much,but we know for the 4 years we had her she had a lovly life as she was always smiling , there will be a sheepie just waiting for you and soon

After we lost Pooh Bear we didn't think we would want another dog because it hurt so much to lose him. Angus came to us as an owner surrender 3 months later and he found a home with us and a place in our hearts. I was on his breeders web site and she has pictures of her puppies from the litters. I found Angus' puppy pictures. So cute. Lurking in the corner of one of his baby pictures was a small (Winnie) "Pooh Bear" toy. Was he meant to be ours or what? Keep your heart open to signs from Ralf. They will be there and they will comfort you. They are around us still. If you sense their presence around you, it will be them. Let your heart grieve and let the tears flow. It's been 18 months since we said goodbye to Pooh Bear and my heart still hurts and the tears still come. We all share your sadness and cry tears for you, too.
:ghug:

"My heart hearts and my stomach is in knots."
I was definitely crying when I wrote this. I meant my heart hurts and my stomach is in knots. Thank you everyone for the support. It's nice to see that my feelings are "normal". It still hurts though. I expect him to bust through the bathroom door whenever I'm getting ready for bed or for work. There's no wiggly butt waiting for me when I get home.
We loved Ralf's personality and after looking into OES's more, we found the traits we loved about Ralf are common for OES's. He was so lovable, cuddly, silly, and smart. Unfortunately, we can't find any more OES in our area.

I am so sorry for your loss. We understand the pain that you are going through.

When Joan and I lost our Jake, I kept seeing him out of the corner of my eye. It was during a long trip and we were camped out in Las Vegas. We stopped to pet a dog being walked and the owner asked us how our dog was and Joan and I both burst into tears. Ruined her day, too. :-(

But now when we think of him it is with a warm love and a smile and an occasional tear in the eye.

Many times people rush out and rescue another dog and many times people wait. We fostered a dog about 7 months later, then fostered and adopted our current boy Mulligan about 8 months after that.

You WILL find your way and what is best for you. Until then, as each day comes and goes your pain will lessen just a tiny bit. You'll be thinking what he would be doing in this or that situation and you'll have your first smile. You will heal, but never forget; you wouldn't want to.

I am very sorry for your loss.

I'm so sorry for your loss and the pain you are going through. The holidays are hard when you miss the presence of our shaggy "kids". :hearts:

I'm sorry to hear of your loss. :cry:

I know how hard it is and how very quiet it is without them around. :ghug:

Is it too soon to be thinking about getting another one? We've been looking and have contacted several breeders (from the list) and found one available. I feel like I'd be "cheating" on Ralf. I miss him so much. I'm also hesitant on the price from a breeder vs the humane society where we found Ralf. OES are just not common in our area.

TeresaS wrote:

I personally do not think it is too soon to get another sheepie. You will never 'replace' Ralf-but a new sheepie in the house can carve a new place of love in your heart and help you smile again. I believe that Ralf would want you to find a new sheepie to love and would not feel that you were 'cheating' on him. In fact he may be 'helping' you find the perfect sheepie. :hearts:

You may not find a sheepie at your Humane Society in your area--but you might check in to rescue. An available puppy from one of the breeders on the referral list is a nice option too.

TeresaS wrote:

It's an individual choice for everyone but when my DH and I lost our last dalmo we decided we needed another dalmo ASAP. It was just too quiet in the house for us and there was no one to 'make' us get our exercise out walking every day. Rastus has in no way replaced our first dalmo Caesar, he is his own dog. There are things he has in common with Caesar but there are also things that are different about him but he helped us fill the hole in our hearts.

All the best no matter what decision you make.

sheepiezone wrote:

TeresaS wrote:

You may not find a sheepie at your Humane Society in your area--but you might check in to rescue. An available puppy from one of the breeders on the referral list is a nice option too.

You shouldn't feel guilty about these feelings. I felt that way after we lost Pooh Bear, too. The house was too quiet, my heart was hurting and my husband lost his sidekick. I honestly believe the pet you lost will have a "paw" in helping you find your next pet. I may a simple phone inquiry about a different rescue dog and by that afternoon we had confirmation that Angus was ours, it happened that fast. I cried when I learned he was ours. We got him 3 months after we lost Pooh. They never replace your lost dog, but find a new place in your life and heart. You will speak of the differences between the two and it helps in the healing process. You will know when it is right for you.

It's never too soon, IMO. You can love more than one dog just as you can love more than one child. But I would caution you to make sure it's the "right" one. I lost a beloved Keeshond years ago, also not a common breed. It was Christmas time, I'd just lost my job, and I grabbed the first one I found. He turned out to be, I think, a puppy mill product, and that was a quick decision I regretted for a long time. You might also consider a non-sheepie from your local shelter to "tide you over" until the right one comes along. If you have room for more than one, it also helps ease the pain when you lose one. Plus they're great companions for each other. My 100-pound sheepie and my 20-pound mutt are the best of friends and love to romp and play together. Best of luck in your search.

Is it too soon? I will say that we weren't home from the vet's after having to put down Bentley for an hour when we decided that after having two Sheepies for over two years that we wanted to maintain that feeling. We also had another Sheepie who only knew the house with another Sheepie and we wanted to be sure she was not going to suffer. We could see her eyes light up when she realized the puppy we brought home was staying.

Only you can be sure when is the right time. We knew when it was right for us and we never looked back. We almost daily remember Bentley and the shear joy he brought to our lives. Zoey and Caitlyn also bring their share of joy too and that all adds up to what pet ownership is to us.

Vance

Vance wrote:

i agree thats why we now have 3 yes a lot to look after but wellllll .
we lost our 1st oes at 12 he was 2 1/2 when we had Mel then Darren two years later so they had always had our Duke when he passed, the lonly feeling just would not go, I left it a little while then got in touch with a breeder who put us on her puppy list but.......
a week later a phone call came asking would we consider a 3year who she had bred who needed rehoming well our car flew down that motorway to pick him up lucky for us he had come from a home who had children which he just loved ...
the story just goes on .........

all I can say is everyone of our OES has a place in our hearts ....

I belive we have an extion of our OES we have lost

:wag:

Thank you everyone for your kind words. I thought I was being "overdramatic" about my feelings but when I hear everyone else's stories, I realize I'm not alone. Some days have been easier than others. I think of my doggie frequently and miss him dearly. We buried him in our backyard and some days I go out and talk to him, or just go out and cry.

We did get another OES from a breeder (from the list here). She's 5 months old and quite a handful. She has definitely filled the emptiness but it's not the same. I knew it wouldn't be but she has her own personality and this breed is just so lovable.

You know, I felt like that when I got Rosie after I lost Doris. When you have that connection with a dog you feel it will never be the same with another- it never is the same. Its different - its more difficult than you remember with your original soul mate. But you will persist and creakingly slowly your new soul mate will appear - all OES are soul mates. This is why we have OES.org. So we can share the love. You will love her just as much even though you don't think so yet- one day you will realise that you just do :hearts:

I still come back here even though Rosie has been gone for nearly a year. My heart is still broken over all my beautiful OES. Nothing will hold it together again until I get another OES. My partner got me another puppy she's cute but she's not an OES. She follows me round the house, and is as good as gold, she's a Xbreed and is so small I'm afraid I will hurt her delicate little bones. Im sure I will grow to love her but it hasn't happened yet and I feel guilty and sorry that this puppy can't get into my heart and heal it, maybe she will in time - It took over a year for Rosie to settle in there comfortably. I come back to OES.org when I miss them and I cry with and for all the other owners who have lost their OES. And I smile and am glad when I see the videos and photos and the new introductions because I know that my dogs were loved and cherished the whole of their lives just like everyone else's on here. And the ones who are rescued by the wonderful people on here will know love and will love back and that makes me cry and be happy all at the same time.

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