My Tribute to Benjamin
My Ben was the sweetest, lovable, funny and most gentle soul I've ever known. Ben was just one of those dogs that could make everyone smile that he met. We traveled all over the country and when I took him for a walk we would have to stop and talk to everyone that passed by. He loved every minute of it. He would just stand or sit and let everyone make a fuss over him. He loved having his picture taken. I'm sure he knew just how cute and handsome he was. Of course I told him that all the time anyway. My dad had a stroke in December of 2009 and spent the winter of 2010 rehabbing in a nursing home. I'd take Ben in to visit him and he was the hit of the nursing home. All the staff and residents looked forward to his visits. I always knew he would make a great therapy dog. Wheelchairs, canes, the noises, nothing even phased him. He was the best puppy and dog ever. He was my third old english sheepdog. They all had the breed traits but each had their own personalities. Ben was the most laid back dog I've ever known. He was such a good boy. I don't know how he could ever be topped. Sam and Max were almost 13 years old when they died. I fully expected to have many more years with Ben. Not even 5 full years. How unfair is that? I can't even begin to tell you how sad and heartbroken I am. Ben started his chemo treatments for Lymphoma on March 18th, 2010. He was just a little over 4 years old, he turned 4 on January 20th, 2010. I know if I hadn't done anything, I would have lost him very soon after that. So I had another 8 months with him to enjoy and cherish everyday we had together. He lost his battle with cancer on November 29th, 2010. With all the treatments, medicine and supplements, I've spent over $10,000 and it was worth every penny to have that time with him. As long as he still had a good quality of life I would have kept going. I know I did everything I could to help him but that still doesn't make this any easier. I started sending Ben update emails on March 18th, the day I was told by my vet he had cancer. As his treatment went on, I would have more friends, neighbors and co-workers ask to be added to my email list. I know a lot of people don't like to have their email address out there for everyone to see, so I Bcc'd the addresses I sent to. What they all couldn't see, was a list of over 50 people that received these updates about Ben. I would also copy and paste my updates to my facebook profile. Many of them had never even met Ben and yet still fell in love with him through my stories, pictures and videos. To me, that says volumes about just how special of a dog he was. Of course, I already knew that! Those of you that have pets and have lost them know how hard it is to lose them. You know it's not "just a dog or just a cat". They were a member of your family. I miss him so very much. We had such a short time together, but great times and memories they were. My motorhome trips won't be the same without him. He loved to travel and meet new people. He was only one and a half years old when we drove to California. This was his first trip in the motorhome and he was as good as gold. I've met the nicest people while traveling because of Ben. We would walk out of the motorhome and people would just be drawn to him. He was an excellent ambassador for the breed. I hope you enjoy my movie of my Benny. I've put together a timeline of his short life of photos and video from the day I got him at 11 weeks old, until the last month of his life at just under 5 years old. I've always kept my dogs in full coat and towards the end of the movie you will see pictures of him losing his hair, being bald and then the hair growing back. When it grew back it was just like when he was a puppy, very black and soft. I'm no stranger to chemo and going bald as I'm a 6 year Breast Cancer survivor myself. I spent a lot of time choosing the right music and lyrics to express my feelings so turn up the volume and listen to the words with the pictures and videos. Now knowing the story of Ben, may cause you to shed some tears watching the movie but you will smile at the same time seeing his happy little face. He was after all, the happiest dog on this earth.   Cindy (Teddy's mom) This is the 1st trailer for the Ben movie This is the 2nd trailer for the Ben movie http://gallery.me.com/cparks57#100034 This will open to my gallery - Make sure you go to full screen after it opens the movie! |
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| Hi Cindy .Just reading that has me crying .I lost my Mitch to lymphoma a few years ago .We went through chemo to and he lasted a good 6 months because of it.We lost him just after his 8th birthday. I haven't watched the videos yet as i have to meet my mother to go shopping and she will wonder whats up with me if i meet her crying  Thanks for sharing your story.  |
| Thank you for sharing your wonderful Ben! Memories help to heal our shattered hearts. What a beautiful and loving tribute. |
Cindy was kind enough to make me a copy of this wonderful tribute to Ben. She gave it to me at Sheepiepalooza. I knew it would be emotional so I put off watching it.  Last night, I watched it. I cried from beginning to end, in the middle I smiled and laughed through my tears. I highly recommend this video. Not only is this an awesome memorial to a very special, kind, joyous sheepie, whose time here was tragically cut short . ..It is a dedication to unconditonal HUMAN love. |
| What a darling boy. It made me grin when he emerged from the tunnel and gave his fuzzy head a shake! He had a big personality. I am sure that you will see the spirit of Ben guiding little Teddy on his own adventures. It was worth every penny you spent to have more time with your sweet boy. Thank you for sharing him with us. |
| Thanks for the great review Val! Yes, it's emotional to watch knowing the story of my Ben, but like you said, it will make you smile and laugh because he always had a smile on his face and a twinkle in his eye. Cindy |
| wow thanks so much for sharing this love story |
| I am downloading the movie right now, I did watch the trailers, what a beautiful boy and what a beautiful tribute for him! p.s. I thought Youtube had increased maximum length allowed to 30 minutes a few months ago. |
| What a wonderful dog and tribute I have cried so much my coffee is salty. He was beautiful just beautiful.... |
| Hi Cindy.... I haven't watched the video yet but, I look forward to sitting down with my kleenex and watching this evening. Thank you for sharing your memories. I too lost my heart dog Quin at the age of 5 to Lymphoma  It was absolutely devastating Julianne's Mitch and my boy Quin had it at the same time.... I am already in tears thinking of watching the video! Thanks again for sharing! |
| Very nice, what sweet tribute(s) to Benjamin! |
What a beautiful tribute to your beautiful boy Benjamin!  Tears and smiles. |
| Beautiful tribute to a very special boy! Tears started at the first head tilt! Thank you for sharing Cindy. |
| What a special boy--a beautiful tribute Cindy. Tears and more tears! But thanks for sharing! |
| I apologize to everyone for making you cry. I wanted everyone to feel my love and devotion to Ben and the sorrow and sadness I felt when I lost him. I actually considered not getting another dog after my loss of Ben, but I love this breed so much and I knew I couldn't be without the love of another sheepie for long. So now there is Teddy. You never forget your dogs that have crossed the bridge, they are forever always in your heart and your memories. Cindy |
| Oh wow! Ok that took many tissues to watch but worth it. What a gift you had on him! So sad he was so young. Thanks for the video. Awesome. |
| Oh, heavens! What an angel, Ben you were one special guy! Thanks so much for sharing the story and the video! |
| Cindy, The movie is so warm and touching that I cried all the way through. The photos are adorable! Thanks so much for sharing. |
| Absolutely beautiful |
| Cindy, you did a beautiful job with Benjamin's tribute. He also had me at the first head tilt. I smiled, laughed, cried and shouted "everyone come see this!", it was the scene of Ben and the deer. His personality shines through all the scenes - he was indeed a special one. Thank you for posting these wonderful memories of your boy. Marianne |
| So sorry for your loss Cindy. Your tribute was outstanding. |
4 my OES wrote: You never forget your dogs that have crossed the bridge, they are forever always in your heart and your memories. Cindy So true, we never forget each dog and they are forever in our hearts and memories. What a wonderful tribute to Ben; He had a lovely personallity. It's good to cry and remember them all - I think so. |
| oy vey I made it through 20 min. and gave up trying to see through my tears. I loved the gray kitty playing with him. when he kept sticking his head in the cat toy I was cracking up. and how he didn't chase that deer I don't know. as a new sheepie owner, I can see why people love and are so devoted to their sheepies thank you for sharing |
| Cindy beautifull tribute to benjamin, how time flies after we have to say goodbye, seems like only a few months ago for anyone that has lost a fur baby, but sadly it is not. They leave us with there pressence, watching over us, regardless of how many years have past, they stay in our minds and hearts for eternity. How fast a year passes and benjamin I am sure is still & always will be looking down from the bridge keeping a sharp eye over you all and making his presence felt when needed. xx to all of you.  |
| What a beautiful rememberence.....Dogs touch our lives for such a short time but the memories they leave behind are life long...Sending good sheepie thoughts up to Benjamin who is playing happily at the bridge sending down positive love and gratitude to his Mommy here on earth I'm sure! |
| Cindy, I just watched the video in its entirety (the trailers were so good I had to!). What a wonderful tribute to Ben and what an amazing dog he was! I fell in love with him after the first song! I understand why you love and miss him so. Thank you so much for sharing this with the list. |
| cant watch it yet, still in tears about Panda and the others....laters....xxxx |
| Cin, I laughed and cried. You and I have breast cancer and our pups cancer in common. Thanks for sharing your love of Benjamin It made me feel better. Xo |
Darcy wrote: Cin, I laughed and cried. You and I have breast cancer and our pups cancer in common. Thanks for sharing your love of Benjamin It made me feel better. Xo I'm glad it could help Darcy. As you said in one of your posts, "Cancer sucks!" Cancer doesn't care who you are, how much money you make, the color of your skin, male or female, human or animal. We can only hope they find a cure and can prevent it from even happening someday. Until that day comes, we can fight it with all we have and if it takes someone we love, we will celebrate their life and know we did what we could and not blame ourselves for not doing enough. Like you with Panda, I felt better watching videos and looking at pictures of Ben to ease my grief. Your husband can't do that yet and that's okay too. Everyone handles their grief in their own way. The day I got his urn a few weeks later was a day of mixed feelings. On one hand, the reality of him never coming back and on the other hand, he was back home with me forever. I didn't have this forum when I lost Ben last year, however I had so many family and friends that loved Ben as much as I did and went through Ben's cancer journey and the grief of his death with me. A network of support is important no matter how you have it, be it this forum or your family, friends and co-workers. Vent as much as you need too, we are all there for you! Having breast cancer like you and losing our pups to lymphoma in common, I truly know how you feel. I'm going into my 7th year cancer free. The day I was told I had breast cancer was a day I'll never forget. I can say I never thought I was going to die. I just new I could beat it, I was more afraid of the treatment. I was never one for needles and hospitals.  The day I was told Ben had lymphoma was way more upsetting to me. He had no other symptoms other than the swollen glands. After talking with the vet oncologist that day, I made the decision to try the chemo. The odds for lymphoma are never good but I wasn't ready to let the cancer win without a fight. My baby boy was only 4 years old and the thought of losing him in what could be a matter of weeks was unthinkable. Having been though chemo and knowing they don't push dogs to being sick from it like they do with people, made that decision a little easier. You did everything you could for Panda. You were able to help end her pain and suffering and lovingly helped her cross the bridge by being there with her. She will always be in your heart and someday when you are ready, she would want you to make room in your heart for another sheepie to share your love with. Cindy |
| I just found this today after coming back from the Vets - of course the test results aren't back yet but When the Vet tells you that theres really no other diagnosis - you know- I think I knew before she told me! I joined this forum when I lost my beautiful soulmate sheepie Doris - I cried for 3 months then and I only stopped crying when Rosie arrived I just want a miracle and it not to be Lymphoma - Rosie has been my best friend for the last 4 and a half years - And now all I can do is ask the universe to let it not be Lymphoma and let it be something else and curable Thank you so much everyone on this forum for just being there and sharing the good times and the bad - It helps so much with the pain, sharing the joy of others and all the wonderful photos. Cindy thank you for the video and the pics as well as the music - I didn't take enough photos in those 4 years and yours helps! |
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