Bibbers and Felicia, kitty sisters
My heart is breaking into so very many, very small, painful pieces. Feli and Bibs are survived by Tonks and Luna, sheepdog sisters; Zatanna, my third cat that was 5 or 6 years younger than them, and Mirth, a brand new kitty we got on Sunday. Bibbers and Felicia never even got to meet her. Felicia Hardy, my Black Cat. The Bald Tailed, Pink Nosed, Baby Bibbin' Freak-- the Fabulous Baby Bibbers. You were the children I could never have. You were the friends I never lost. You were the sisters that distance denied me. I'm going to miss you forever and ever. I love you, my dearest ones, with all of my heart. Wait for me, my sweet hearts. I will look for you at the bridge when my own day is done.  |
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| Oh God, Allison, I'm so very sorry for your recent losses. It's more than anyone should ever have to bear. |
| Thank you Ron. I'm not really bearing it well. Its almost 2am, and I cannot go to bed. That photo was taken in the bed; thats what every night looked like, for more years than I care to think about. My third cat is hiding in the closet (lest I kill her too, I suppose) and my new cat is lurking elsewhere. Adam and I haven't shared a bed in years; the irony being that there were always "too many damned cats" in it. I offered to close them out of our bedroom, and he never wanted to deny them that. "They came first" was all he'd ever say. So now my bedroom, which used to have 3 cats in the bed (one on my pillow over my head, one always at my side, the third squeezing in where she could) is now painfully empty. I may just camp out on the couch.... |
| I'm so sorry to hear of Felicia's crossing the bridge Allison. It nearly killed me to lose one cat companion and my bed seemed too big and empty, so I can't imagine losing two. My heartfelt sympathy goes out to you.  |
| Im so sorry Allison...many many hugs to you tonight |
| Oh Allison, my heart goes out to you. You've had more than enough pain. My thoughts and prayers are with you during this dark time. |
| Hugs to you... I just know your kitty sisters are snuggling together once again |
| Allison: I am so sorry to hear of all of your recent losses....such beautiful sweet kitties. Strength to you in your grief. Tears, |
 I am so sorry for your losses. I love cats and life is hard when you have to say goodby.Tons of hugs to you and your family. |
| Allison, I am so sorry..your tribute to these sweet sisters is so touching. As you said, they are together now, waiting for you and all your other furkids. |
| Allison, I am so sorry. My heart aches for you as tears pour down my face. I am so sorry for your loss. |
| So sorry Allison, I know your heart is breaking. You gave them a lovely tribute. |
| The photo of your two bed buddies is just beautiful. Hugs to you Allison. peg The photo of your |
| So sorry for your losses, that's very hard, I hope Tonks, Luna, your other cats and Adam are all smothering you with hugs. |
| Allison--so very sorry for your loss. I know that pain and my heart goes out to you. |
sheepiezone wrote: I know that pain and my heart goes out to you. You'll all be surprised, but I didn't know the pain. I've never had to put a pet to sleep; I haven't lost a pet since our first sheepdog when I was 7 years old. All my other pets were lost due to circumstance and not death. For example, when my parents divorced, I lost our sheepdog and two cats, but they weren't dead. They were just with my father. That sort of thing happened a couple of times; pets going another way than my own-- not dead, but not with me. Living their lives out with someone other than me. So here I am, almost 40, and dealing with the death of a pet for the first time, and the second time, in a very short time span. I'm glad I did not go through this earlier in my life; it might have affected my decision to get litter mates again, when I got Tonks and Luna. |
| Oh Allison, I can't imagine how difficult these past weeks have been for you! Please take comfort in knowing that these two sisters had the best life imaginable and still have each other beyond this life. Sending your way.NIta |
| I am so sorry for your loss. The sisters are together again, I know that doesnt help you much with your pain but be happy for them to be reunited. Love to you and your family. |
| That was a great tribute to your kitty girls. A big hug to you Allison The pain is bad now, but it WILL get better. Eventually you can look back at all the great times, over all those years you had together. Maybe now the only little bit of "feel good" you can muster is that they lived a good long life, you were able to let them go when it was time and not linger, and they are now together as sisters again. |
| It is strangely comforting to know that they are together. Its pretty obvious that Felicia's heart literally broke with her sister gone. Its just hard to be left behind. Our county allows for pets to be buried on your property. I had already ordered a bunch of seeds and plants; I was going to create a woodland garden where Bibbers' resting place is. Now I can put Felicia there too. Friends of ours are sculptors specializing in casting. I'm going to try my hand at sculpting a memorial, and they've assured me that they will cast it for me in something that will weather well in the elements. Who knows, with any luck by summer I may have a lovely garden in honor of our furry children. |
Darth Snuggle wrote: Our county allows for pets to be buried on your property. I had already ordered a bunch of seeds and plants; I was going to create a woodland garden where Bibbers' resting place is. Now I can put Felicia there too. Friends of ours are sculptors specializing in casting. I'm going to try my hand at sculpting a memorial, and they've assured me that they will cast it for me in something that will weather well in the elements. Who knows, with any luck by summer I may have a lovely garden in honor of our furry children. That sounds lovely Allison. A pretty and peaceful spot in your garden where you can go and take the time to remember your girls and all the special things about them. Please remember to post photos when it's done. Still thinking of you in your loss. |
| I'm so sorry for your loss of Felicia, Allison. I know the heartache of losing one pet, but I can't imagine the pain of losing two so close together. You're in my thoughts and prayers as you go through this very difficult time. |
| Big hugs to you. |
| That is just terrible. I am so so sorry. |
| hugs, big ones, i am soo sorry for your loss, but your tribute was lovely. big hugs. |
| Beautiful tribute to your lovely pets..hugs to you xx |
| I'm sorry for all of your recent losses. The photo of the two girls together is so sweet, the timing and the loss is so sad. I still miss our cats very much, and we lost our last one almost 3 years ago now. |
| I put Felicia in the ground today, next to her sister The Bibbers. Its all so unbearably sad. Adam took me out to dinner, saying I shouldn't have to cook. I had a wee bit too much to drink. I feel like I'm going to be sad about all of this forever. I look forward to years down the road, when I can look back with fondness, untarnished by sorrow. |
| I'm sad that you've had this double loss. I know you feel like you'll be sad forever, but someday you'll notice it has lifted. You'll never ever forget them and you'll be able to have those happy memories, especially out in your garden. |
| Cats have a way of entertwining themselves with their humans but remaining oh so "cat." They were in your life for many years, of course their passing leaves a big hole in your heart. Time does heal, but never completely. Eventually it hurts less, but you'll always keep a tear close at hand when you think of them. It is your job. |
| Oh--it is so hard. Special thoughts and good wishes for you. We have our new little guys now and although they can't replace Tucker--they are bringing some joy to these gloomy days and it hurts a little less. I was really reluctant to get another but so glad now that I did-- and two for the price of one was a bonus! Double trouble around here right now. |
| Its almost a year later. Re-reading this, I wanted to thank everyone for their kind words. I still cry all the time about Bibbers and Feli. I hope that's normal. I ended up sleeping in the guest room for such a long time that we made it the master bedroom, and turned the master into my studio and my old studio into the guest room. I think it helped. I retired all the old bedding, and bought new; I repainted all three rooms-- anything to get rid of that terrible empty feeling of where my lovely girls used to be. The garden I planned didn't get very far. I had planted quite a bit of Forget-Me-Nots and they were doing well, when the lawn guys mistook it for weeds and sprayed the lot of it. I have since bought a ton of bulbs that are spring blooming- I hope to spend this coming Saturday planting them all. New Cat has turned out to be an excellent companion. She's very affectionate and quite the personality- something I needed. She's been a lovely distraction. And she's really brought out a playful side of our one remaining cat; she's 12 this year, and now runs around the house and doesn't let the dogs confine her to the bed room. Tonks and Luna actually took one of the old cats toys out of the trash- I had thrown the lot away when Bibbers and Feli died. They took turns carrying it around the house for weeks; maybe even months. I didn't have the heart to take it away from them, and its still among the new toys we have. They'll still pull it out and play with it from time to time, and I think its nice that they like it, and maybe even remember the cats from the smell on it. Writing all this, I'm crying like a damned idiot again. But I figure it will happen a lot leading up to Saturday, and then through the next month to when Feli died. May as well get it out of my system early in the day. My thanks to all of you again for extending your condolences last year. |
| for you....it will still be painful, but they are together...xxx |
| aww allison...i understand too well last night while taking a shower, i realized it was 2 weeks...it seems like forever without panda..this morning i had a designer ask how panda was and i broke down in tears...her happy bark still rings in my mind though....and as disgusting as it is, we are still using the comforter that she threw up on (i did wash it) but there is a stain there that wont come out... panda is there chasing bibbers and felicia and im sure getting no where...she love a good cat chase but was at a loss for what to do when she cornered one.... one day, we will get to hold and love on them again....of that, im sure |
Darcy wrote: aww allison...i understand too well last night while taking a shower, i realized it was 2 weeks...it seems like forever without panda..this morning i had a designer ask how panda was and i broke down in tears...her happy bark still rings in my mind though....and as disgusting as it is, we are still using the comforter that she threw up on (i did wash it) but there is a stain there that wont come out... panda is there chasing bibbers and felicia and im sure getting no where...she love a good cat chase but was at a loss for what to do when she cornered one.... one day, we will get to hold and love on them again....of that, im sure I know what you mean about disgusting; I threw all those toys out because they stank. And of course Tonks and Luna picked the one that reeked of cat urine. I just couldn't take it away from them. And I couldn't get rid of the one cat bed- and new cat loves to sleep in it now. I think what so hard is that after so many years- in my case it was 18- they cease to be animals. I could look into my cats eyes and know what they were thinking. They would meow and I understood what they wanted. I've had new cat for a year, and I still see a cat when I look at her. When I looked at Bibbers and Feli, I saw little personalities. |
| yup....you had ''the connection'' with them...the same with panda...i totally understand the looking in their eyes...the emotion that you saw there..... i have several friends with dogs and ive held them and cuddled with them, but theyre just dogs...until the other night when tom, who lives in my build, was walking his golden, mollie...we sat down and were talking and mollie shoved her head into my chest. moaned and layed down on top of me....SHE knew....she is more than a dog...deeper some how...some are, some arent..but holding mollie helped.... |
| I am so sorry for your loss. We lost our sweet CoCo to diabetes about 3 years ago. It was horrible and I know how much your heart is breaking with 2 losses so close together. My thoughts and hugs are with you. |
| Allison--right with you on this one. My little Tucker (just a year old) passed away upstairs on the back of a chair last October. I really had a tearful day this year on the anniversary of his passing. I think of him often and even though we have two new kitties that are just full of personality and real characters--I still miss my little Tucker. He was a special one --I had asked the breeder for him before he was even born. When he was born and was EXACTLY what I had 'ordered' both she and I were amazed. I brought him home and he was special from the first day. I got rid of the chair and the sofa that went with it--redecorated the room complete with new furniture and new paint. Before that I did not even want to go up to that room. I love the room now --but when go in there--my first thought is about my little guy. Special thoughts for you. The tears are normal I think--even a year later. My little Tucker...  |
| Thinking of all of you who have lost a special furkid. I lost my 16 year old siamese boy, Kasumi, to cancer a little over 4 years ago, he was my baby boy and I was devastated. Rowdy my new siamese is great and loves to snuggle but for reasons I don't fully understand he did not fill the big set of shoes left by Kasumi. I had loved all our dogs very much but thought I was more in touch with cats. And then Tiggy came.........OMG she is the light of my life and the daughter I don't have. I already dread losing her. |
Mim wrote: And then Tiggy came.........OMG she is the light of my life and the daughter I don't have. I already dread losing her. Adam and I have had this conversation as well; when it comes time for Tonks and Luna, I think we'll need to be institutionalized. Its why I'm talking about adding a new puppy to our already full home in the next year-- when the dreaded day comes, we'll need something or someone to go on for. And so, I suspect, will whichever dog is left behind. |
| Oh, gee. I know how hard this is. We still have some people stop us and ask us where the third one is when we are out with Sophie and Sherman. We lost Archie more than a year ago. And of course, people still remember Merlin, the original, the king of the group. I think I started dreading the day that Vincent (orange tabby) crosses the day my daughter got him 4 years ago. She will have a terrible time with that. I think we all need a group hug. |
| I'm so sorry for your loss! I'm sure it's just as fresh today as it was then. And personally I think it's normal to grieve for a very long time when you have a deep connection with your pet. I'm finding the holidays to be especially hard! Hannah's bed had an odor but I still couldn't bring myself to wash it for quite a while. I think it's fortunate you had a long time period with them, but honestly it's never enough! I'm sure they are watching over you trying to remind you of the happy times and would want you to find peace and happiness. |
| I wan to thank everyone again; I think being able to talk about it here made the whole thing so much more manageable for me. I spent Saturday as I'd planned; cleaning out the area where I'd buried both kitties (leaves had fallen much deeper than I'd realized) and then planting bulbs for the spring. And while i feared I'd cry the whole time, I really had gotten it out of my system by then, thank in a big part to this thread. So thanks again to everyone here, for their love and support! |
| Allison, Big to you and yours...so sorry for your loss.Those bulbs will be very beautiful in the spring, and they will brighten your home and garden with |
| So sorry Allison. |
| Today marks the one year anniversary of my sending Felicia to the bridge to be with her sister. I'm so grateful for the pets we have; Tonks and Luna, and the cats Zatanna who is a nut job and Mirth, who is the sweetest stone-cold killer cat ever. But nothing will ever fill the void left by my kitty sisters, Feli and Bibs. I'm also grateful to all my friends here. Getting to post and talk and read and cry has been a big help to me; Thanks to you all! |
| A year already. |
| Bless you and your fur kid family. Anniversary's are very hard. |
| Cindy |
| Allison, Your babies were beautiful and well loved!!! |
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| Two years without my Bibbers. I miss you sweetie, with all my heart. |
| What can I say?? It's hard |
| The heart never forgets |
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| Year three. The pain is always there; I can't decide if it gets more dull as the time passes, or if we just become accustom to it always being there. I still miss you, Bibs, and your sister Feli. There are new kitties here, but they don't replace you; not ever. I suspect you would not have liked the new cats, but they are happy to have a home to call their own. XOXO |
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| I am so sorry for your loss. I think we just learn to live in life without them, the pain is always there and comes to ahead at their anniversary. I have found anniversaries are always really tough. |
| 18 is a long time and the pain of such a loss lingers. How nice they still mean so much to you years after they are gone. |
Oh goodness  I'm so very sorry for your recent losses of the babies. You are going through so much right now. xoxo |
Stacy wrote: Oh goodness I'm so very sorry for your recent losses of the babies. You are going through so much right now. xoxonot really recent' it's been three years this year. But it still stings when I think about it. I still cry at odd times. And the pets seem to remember; which is damn odd. Luna has been frantically digging through her toy box the last two nights; she NEVER does this; it was so weird to see her repeatedly plunging her massive head into a pile of stuffed toys. At the end of the second night, she retrieved what she was looking for; a tattered old cat toy- the one she rescued from the trash after Bibbers died! I couldn't believe it! She's played with it, and then our remaining original cat Zatanna stole it away and she cuddled with it- she rarely plays with toys. So I guess they remember. |
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