Baby on the way in 12 days-some questions
Latley I've seen a lot of new babies still in hospital wearing their own clothes. Is this pretty common? Just wondering if I should pack her diaper bag with her own clothes or not. I will be breastfeeding. What r some of Ur favorite nursing pads(the ones u put in bra to cover leakage)? Nursing bra's? What kind of nursing tops dud u find/get the most use out of? Did u bring them to hospital or stay in the hospital gowns??? I know it's a lot of questions but wd just got the news about c-section today and my next appt isn't until next Tuesday. My mind is going a bit crazy. I've Bern so focuse on getting ready for baby Mackenna I forgot about the whole breastfeeding thing :0) ren M[/img] |
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| How exciting for you. I bet you're on pins and needles!!!
Everything is dependent on you. 1. Bring kid clothes if you're into making your lo always look cute. Some people don't and the hospital will provide you with what you need. There's also thought that you want something very easy to put on and off b/c putting clothes on and off a nb is NOT easy as they are so fragile and you're always afraid of bending their fingers back while putting sleeves on and crazy things (you'll see). I'm into all that is cute, so I had to bring my own clothes. 2. Nursing pads. I like gerber pads, but everyone is different. Every time this thread is made on a baby board, this is one of the FEW things that people just can't agree on. Try some, buy "heavy" and go from there. I have big boobs, so I didn't want something bulky making me look bigger. You may want that padding and choose to go with something that gives you that (just an example of differences). 3. Nursing shirts. They always recommend button down shirts that are easy to open. There are also tank tops for nursing that you can google. I've been bf'ing on what's going on my third child (each go for 13-14 months), and I've always just worn t-shirts. First off, you'll want to wear something comfortable after delivery and pulling up your shirt REALLY ain't no thang. Just have a receiving blanket near you to 1) catch the squrting milk from your ta-ta 2) to throw over your boob if a dr comes although the dr/nurses won't care 3) there WILL be a million people coming in constantly after you have the baby asking you if you want photos, guidance from a chaplain, and then the nurses. I again like to look cute so I did not stay in the hospital gown. I just don't like to be TOO loose while loose fitting clothes did the job. 4. Congrats and don't sweat anything esp. if it's a c-section. Easy breezy. It's the recovery that you'll just have to push through, take your pain killers, and pray you don't have to strain too much during your first poo. My nurse gave me apple juice/prune juice (actually tasted fantastic) that she put in the microwave 1 min every day, and that totally did the trick for me and I think it was a WEEK before my first poo. Not normal btw.. but the point is, it didn't hurt. 5. Don't forget your lactation nurse IS your bff. If it hurts while you feed, call her ...you're doing it wrong. If the milk doesn't feel like it's coming in, trust trust trust it will with time. ...just don't give up. And know you'll have to go through the pain of your milk coming in whether you bf or not, so you might as well push through it. It DOES get better and before you know it, you'll be cooking your meal while you've got a kiddo latched on your boob. |
| Wow fantastic info thanks so much! I'm very much a private person as far as nudity goes but I guess I'm just gonna have to relax and not be so uptight about it. I'm a bit worried about Hubby's mom though. She's VERY excited and well very assertive. Hubby n I been together for 7 years with some in high school so she's like second mom to me but now she's also one out of my 3 college professors. She's just been really pushy about her involvement with baby. Hubby n I've tried setting clear boundries but it's such a fine line we half to walk cuz we will need her help and her "mercy" when it comes to class this semester.... Situation is just tricky... She's one of those that if she believes something is one way there is no way to convince her otherwise. Sigh. Currently she's mad at us b/c we didn't tell her exactly what time our version procedure was so she could visit. We didn't want visitors, we were focused on Mackenna and each other. Hubby doesn't think the situation is that serious but it's hard to retain nice feelings towards her when she's so negative or pushy about the choices we r making about baby.
Guess we'll just have to feel it out. It may come down to a serious conversation with hurt feelings but I don't feel like I can start it by myself. I feel like hubby needs to initiate it as she's slightly obssessed with comparing his birth/pregnancy to mine. I think she's having a hard time recognizing that her son is his own adult person now! Ren m |
| I'm an EXTREMELY private person too and the thought of someone looking at my saggy ta-ta did not get me excited, so I understand. I totally covered up when any and everyone came in. You just have to hold you breath and give in though when it comes to being shown how to latch on ...if you need help. I tend to think I've got everything myself b/c I'm wonder woman, but this was one of those things that I did need help with for reasons such as...
1) didn't know what to do when lo would keep sleeping and it was time to feed 2) didn't know how to hold my boob, baby, and keep my position all at once ...at first ...not to mention, deciding which position best suited me 3) didn't know how to open lo's mouth and shove most of my boob in the mouth b/c lo should never just be on the nipple 4) just confirmation that i was doing it right So just keep that all in mind 
I totally understand about the mil. My sil just had another baby and she had something very similar. MIL was insisting on being in the room b/c it was their first baby and she was a nurse. She wanted to keep things peaceful between the two but finally had to basically push her outside when it came time to give birth.  Again, I'm a private person so I wanted no one there, and I promise things will work out. You can always use excuses like being so tired and/or telling the nurses/dr that you don't want visitors and they are real good about pushing folks out w/o making it look like it was you. They've heard/seen it all.  |
| BTW, all this bf'ing talk is totally making me ready to feed ..if ya know what I mean. But if you don't, you will soon... |
| Lol I get what u mean! I hope I'll have an easier time of getting the hang of bfeeding but I'll prob need help considering this is my 1st!
Gonna check out nursing shirts out tonight! This is gonna be the longest 12 days ever. Gonna keep in mind about letting the nurses/dr get people out ofthe room. My parents are just as excited but our relationship hasn't always been so great so they r respectful of our boundaries and don't push in unless asked. Hubby n his mom well- she had him at 18 she was single and basically when from bottom to top of the world by her own grit and determination(to hear her tell it). She's always been overlyattached to hubby but since we got pregnant it's been a bit insane. Too make it worse the school program I'm in is very small and selective and she's one of 3 professors that run it. She also has a billion connections in my future field. Shed NEVER admit it but she is the queen of grudges. I'm just worried if we try to set some firm boundaries about her involvement it's gonna cone back to bite me, something hubby doesn't have to worry about. She's also careful to keep the "sting" out of her comments when he's around so I think he thinks I'm being too sensative. Oh well. Such is life not everything is cut n dry. Ren m |
| I had 4 children and 4 c-sections: my first one was because of breech position/first time as well. Breast fed all 4.
I never used nursing pads and didn't use nursing bras, either. I did use front closure bras. I'm minimally endowed (although I did sort of get to be more like Dolly Parton while nursing) so this wasn't such an issue. Money was for me, though and I frankly couldn't afford special bras, so I made do and I think it was a better choice. I also never used nursing pads. I think the hospital provided some and I didn't find them comfortable. And I didn't really ever need them. Nursing tops: Well, you are a bit lucky as many fashionable tops lend themselves to nursing. I'm thinking of the ones which are loose, with a kind of yoke and some gathering below that. Those were popular when my kids were born and so I never bought a nursing top. I just wore loose tops and sort of shoved the baby up my shirt. Also, you should have a good supply ( a dozen or more) of the light weight baby blankets/receiving blankets. They are invaluable for providing a drape/extra coverage for modesty. And even if you plan on using disposable diapers, ask people to give you a couple of dozen cloth ones. They make the very best burp cloths. I wore one on my shoulder for a good bit. And at the end, they make great cleaning cloths. No matter what the baby magazines tell you, you do NOT need every specialized bit of equipment for different specific jobs. Sometimes, it's just too much, not to mention expensive. We were quite poor and did very nicely without a lot of extras. However, a good car seat, a good baby bed and/or bassinet are not extras, but absolute necessities. So is a good stroller. I found one that I could open and close with one hand as the other arm was holding the baby. And a good diaper bag. The rest is just extra. I can't give you any advice about the mil except that I'm pretty sure that if you (privately) tell the delivery room nurses/personnel that you don't want anyone other than hubby in the delivery room, they'll keep her out. Set it up before hand. Also try giving her some specific job: making sure you come home to a clean house and some cooked meals would be high on my list of suggestions. Also, if she wants to help, let her do the laundry, vacuum, etc. Or (and trust me, you will need this) tell her you'd love her to take care of the baby while you take a shower and/or nap. You don't have to take her advice, but I will be honest and say that many things my mil told me were very much appreciated, although too often, not immediately. Sometimes months or even years later, I realized the wisdom. Truth is, though, that we all have to learn our own way. You will. Oh, and ditto re: lactation nurse/consultant. If you have questions, ask, even if you are afraid it will make you look silly. That's what they are there for. Btw, I called my pediatrician in alarm because the day I got home with my baby, he had bowel movements that resembled cottage cheese mixed with mustard. Perfectly alarming for an inexperienced first time mom but perfectly normal for a breast fed baby. The nurse had the good grace not to laugh but to tell me it was normal. This is how you will know if you have a good pediatrician: they don't laugh, but compliment and encourage you. |
| Thanks fir all the great advise! My mil really is a good person just overbearing which is hard for me to "endure gracefully". But I know it'll work itself out.
I'm so excited time can't move fast enough. I think a lot of the shirts I have already will work. I was given a box of nursing pads. Haven't tried anyout yet to see how comfortable they are but maybe I won't need them too!?! When we were in hospital for the version procedure it helped me alot as far as knowing what to expect as far as nudity goes. I'll just have to remember that they do this everyday. Besides I used to work at a state school taking care of women everyday. I know that nudity and daily human "functions" are just accepted dealt with and that's that. It's just really hard to remember that when my flabby thigh is exposed! Ren m |
| Ren--congrats!
First off, I can't believe you tried a version procedure. The idea of that scares me! My DD was breech too, so I had a c-section. I didn't have previa, but she was (is!) my first child and a girl...Didn't know about those factors. As for your questions: 1. I brought a take-home outfit for her, but kept her in the hospital outfit while we were there. Plus, she was SO tiny that even her premie clothes that I bought her were big. So she just looked ridiculous. Plus, with all the checks they give the baby, it's easier if they're in easily accessible clothes. 2. I used Lasinoh. They were fine. Just enough coverage to prevent leaks but not bulky. I bought 2 nursing bras I think from Target and I thought they were great. They had latches on the top corners of the cup that you just unhinged. I basically lived in nursing tank tops. The kind that just unhooked at the strap. Super easy and no-fuss. I found all the 'cute' or 'real' nursing tops to look either like I was still super pregnant or they were too loose on top. You'll just have to go and look and find some stuff that works for you. Again, Target was where I got the nursing tank tops. 2a) I stayed in the hospital gown for most of the time. I added my own robe after a while, but it was just easier to be in the gown with all the doctor's checks and not wanting anything near my incision site. Make sure to bring super comfy pants to wear home that won't cut into your stomach at all. Also, staying in the hospital gown meant that you didn't have to worry about anything gross getting on your own clothes. I also loved the hospital underwear... 3) Breastfeeding...I never got to the point where I could make dinner and bfeed at the same time. It never stopped hurting for me. I know that 'they' say that it gets better or you're doing it wrong. Mine never got better. I had a friend watch her when she was about 6 weeks old and she gave her a bottle and she sucked SO hard my friend (who had a baby the same age and an older one) was shocked. So I think my baby was just too strong Anyways, feel free to ask lactation nurses for help, but don't worry if it isn't going as planned. It happens.
4) yeah, looking at Mrs J's post, remember to take your painkillers BEFORE you start to hurt. Just stay ahead of the pain. For me, days 2-6 were the worst pain-wise, but then got better pretty quickly from then on. And then you have to remember to keep taking it easy, even when you feel like you're okay to do stuff. I'm a private person too, and my hospital was pretty good about knocking and stuff. Good luck! It'll go by so fast! |
| My first (a girl) was breech also, ended up having an emergency c section.
I think with a c section the worst pain is when you cough or sneeze. Keep a pillow with you all the time to hold against your tummy if you need to sit up or get up to walk around. |
| Great tips again thank you. I just went to target today and they have the softest pj's! Nice loose strechy pants that'll work with the incision and 2 pj tops that will work and be cute. B/c I have a feeling when I don't have to go school Ill be in pj's :0) and they did have the best nursing tanks fir cheap compared to 2 other stores plus Motherhood maternity. That's good to keep in mind about baby clothes that shell need to be checked often, hadn't thought about it like that.
Ren m |
barney1 wrote: 3) Breastfeeding...I never got to the point where I could make dinner and bfeed at the same time. It never stopped hurting for me. You may not have the need to yet. Things get more tricky as the number of children go up. Not that I ever cooked while bf'ing, but there are definitely times you have to keep the kiddo latched as you check on the stove, grab something for kid 2 who is about to scream if you don't and you're on the phone (and you kept latched so the person on the phone wouldn't hear baby 1 scream bloody murder), your helpless husband needs something and he thinks it's easier for you to answer now instead of him having to use his noggin' to figure it out himself, ....etc. |
| Yes, take pain pills AND stool softeners.
In the olden days, you couldn't go home until you went. I rested much better at home than I ever did in the hospital. |
tgir guest wrote: Yes, take pain pills AND stool softeners.
In the olden days, you couldn't go home until you went. I rested much better at home than I ever did in the hospital. Ha ha, the olden days for me was 2008! lol. They wouldn't let me leave until I went. I didn't need the softeners, though. I can't believe I just wrote that on the internet 
See, I was the opposite. I had her on Tuesday evening around 5 and then left Thursday afternoon around 3, so not quite 2 days and I would have loved to have had another day in the hospital. My DH had to go back to work the next day but wanted to escort me home so I went home a day early. So, if you have time and don't feel like leaving, stay another day! |
| So anybody have any idea about any driving restrictions after the c-sec? MIL mentioned that u usually can't drive for awhile. I've got the hubby to chauffeur me around for 6 weeks but just curious.
Doc said that we'd for sure be there for 2 days and if we felt like it or there were issues we'd stay until Saturday. Also i am a full time student and will be expected to be back in class ASAP, but wasn't sure about sitting in class or anything like that. I guess i'll ask hospital staff about that later but didn't know if they say not to be up and about for so many days after the surgery. B/c as long as i can make into the bldg and sit down it'll help me out a lot with being able to keep up in my classes. I just have two classes on MW and 2 in TTH so it shouldn't be too bad.... Getting ready for the big day (Wednesday the 20th) not too much left to do anymore besides wait1 Ren M |
| It's coming up! So exciting!
I believe the driving restrictions were either 2 or 3 weeks, but I'm thinking it's 2. Once you have it, you'll be surprised at how much of your stomach muscles you use when you don't think you do. So I think the restrictions are in case of a hard break situation, where you could end up tearing the incision. Hmmm. Aside from being exhausted from having a newborn who's up every 2 hours to feed, I don't know if I would be able to comfortably (and actually concentrate to learn!) in class for about a month or so. The first week or 2 of the c section it was fairly uncomfortable (not painful usually, just not comfy), and then after that, the adrenaline of being up with a new baby had worn off and I was tired. Like tired I didn't know existed. But, everyone is different, so maybe you could be back in class in 2 weeks or so. Good luck!! |
| Ask now about driving restrictions, keeping in mind that it is possible that you will do a bit better or not quite as well as the average. It is a very good idea that you get an idea now, before you are overwhelmed with baby stuff, how long you will need transportation.
As far as going back to class--sitting in class for a few hours at at time isn't likely to be a huge issue. But if I were you and I had a choice, I'd sit out this semester (surely it's started or about to start? One of my sons started this week and the other starts next week). For one thing, I do much better as a student if I am getting enough rest and not recovering from childbirth and surgery. Second of all, I'm a much better mother if I'm not exhausted from trying to keep up with class and take care of new baby and home, etc. Thirdly, I am a much better person if I'm not exhausted. Now, I know women who went back very quickly and did fine. I found that I recovered better when I was in a position to get a decent amount of sleep. Right now, you don't know what kind of baby you will have. My first child slept well early on. My second child didn't sleep through the night until he was a year and a half old and didn't nap until he was 3 years old. Yes: 3 YEARS. This is when many children are outgrowing their naps. If he had been my first child, he would have been an only child. He's great now, but I thought I would collapse from exhaustion. My two youngest children were born during one of my stints as a student. Now, I was insane and was certain that having a newborn (and other children) and going to school was no excuse not to continue with the same high standards of housekeeping, including EVERY single meal home cooked from scratch, home made halloween costumes, home made Christmas gifts, home made cookies (the cookie jar was always full), plus gardening, plus a lot of volunteer work, etc. Did I mention that I was insane? This was NOT a good plan for my academic career and it didn't make me a better wife or mother. I was young then, and full of energy, but if I could go back and tell my younger self something, I'd tell me to take it a bit easier when I could. I am afraid I am putting a damper on your enthusiasm. I don't mean to do that at all. I guess I just want you to be kinder to yourself than I was to myself. |
| The other restriction you may have is stairs. If you do go back to school before your 6 wk recovery, make arragements with the school to us the handicap elevator temperarly.
Good luck with the baby and the Pillow for the stomach is VERY important when you laugh, sneeze, move to get up, roll over ect. the pillow is your friend.  |
| I've been hearing a lot about this pillow, it'll def be one of the 1st things i ask the nurses for!
Believe me i do NOT want to have to go to class this semester but i am already a 2nd yr senior and won't graduate until May of 2011! If i take this semester off i won't be able to start again until next spring, putting me another year behind then there's loans to think about and the list just goes on and on....But on the upside i only have 3 professors this semester and one being my MIL, the other2 being grandpas and all 3 have know me for years. I've had extensive convo's with all of them and they will all work with me and since ordinarily i am an A student they aren't that worried about me if i do less than that this semester! So i think i will be ok..probably. As far as cooking and housecleaning...let's just say i don't cook(neither does hubby) not like homemade stuff. i do make a mean box of mac n cheese and he can re-heat leftovers like nobodies business  I'm a bit more of a neat freak but we have sooo many close relatives that have already pledged themselves to cook and clean for us(seriously- they have a schedule and everything) that i am not even the least bit concerned  Plus Hubby, (starting this past Friday) will be off on paid paternity leave thru March 3rd  So he's gonna be an very active daddy! I'm making him change the 1st diaper. Of course he really won't be able to help with breast feeding but i'll still make him get up and bring her to me and change her, that kind of stuff. he's excited and unlike a lot of guys he really gets the fact that its not just the woman's job to take care of the baby. It took two to create her, she's just as much his as mine so he's all for being hands on
I'm just so excoted! This morning we made ourselves sleep in until 10:30 just so we could say we did before the baby gets here Now we just got to handle the overzealous family members who are "fighting" over who gets to hold her 1st  Which i will get to hold her then hubby then me then hubby then maybe others so we are employing the nurses to help keep the peace. Along with a poster hubby made that says "just b/c u held her first doesn't mean you love her more than the person that held her last" Sometimes people lose perspective when they are excited
Again, Thanks for all the wonderful advice! Ren m |
| So we got to the hospital yesterday and I mentioned that when Mackenna gets hiccups latley it feels like it's in a different spot latley. So they checked and Mac turned herself head down. So we didn't get the c-section. Which was very dussapointing as well we were prepared to be parents by noon! So now it's Thursday and I'm STILL pregnant. I was only 1cm dilated,0% effaced and still really high so they didn't think inducing would be a good idea.
So now I get to wait around for labor to start- this may seem silly but I've been prepared for the c-section for the lady month and a half. Now that I'm going to be going hhis vaginally I'm totally freaking out....my granpatebts came into town and other family members did too so eveyones dissaponted that we were basically told to wait when we expected to be parents already. Coming hone from the hospital without Mackenna was very difficult. I know it could have been worse but this is really got me down.... Ren m |
| I'm sorry it's not worked out like you thought, but you will forget ALL about it once it's over. At least that's the only positive I can tell ya right now because I know that misery you feel is the worst feeling ...ever!!!! |
| The fact she turned on her own is a sign she wants to do her own thing. I'm thinking she'll be her own woman. Be patient, give the gathering relatives a nice stiff cocktail and just concentrate on you, your hubby and baby. MIL, even though she may be spiteful, will not ruin your future...you are the mother of her grand-daughter and if get's to that point remind her of that. Do not let anyone ruin this very special time for you and your husband. Relax, enjoy and if you need to, be firm. This time belongs to you & hubby. Best wishes for a wonderful delivery, healthy/ happy baby and a great career............Kathy |
| Good luck. I would be thrilled that she flipped back the "right way" for birth. I understand the frustration though - you have had a long time to know she was going to be a section and got all mentally and physically prepared for that.
Let family go on this one - if they are upset - let them deal with it.  - lol
As others have mentioned - this is you and your husbands baby, not theirs.
I love that your husband is getting the time off. It will be helpful in a practical way, but emotionally too. He will bond so much more and feel an equal parent. Todd was a huge help with our twins - and having them 1st made him a very capable, competant parent! He loves babies and is critical of guys who pass off the parenting.... Good luck - hope to hear good baby news (with pictures of course!) very soon! |
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