How do you know when to say goodbye?
He was on Rimadyl for a long time, but then his liver started to be affected, so I put him on Adequan shots. It seemed to help a little, but I had to stop them a couple of months ago and can't afford the four week routine to get him back on them. If you place your hands on the top of his hips, you can feel the leg bones constantly popping in and out of the joint. My vet noticed this last month and suggested he go on a diet. I've got him on reduced food, but he hasn't lost much weight at all. He has been a real trooper all this time and only recently let out a yowl of pain a couple of weeks ago. Tonight he was crying after I let him outside after I got home. He wasn't his normal self and I thought he might have hurt his paw. Then he yelled out in pain twice while laying on his side. He tries to get up, but then just flops back down. I'm going to talk with his Vet tomorrow and hopefully get some answers/advice. I don't want him to suffer anymore. My heart is just breaking watching him like this. He has bounced back before... but this is the worse he's ever been. So I guess my question is how do you know when to help them cross the bridge? |
|
|
| I'm so sorry you and your buddy are suffering through this.
It is the hardest decision to make. The only advice I can offer is talk to your vet for a less emotionally involved opinion. And then you can only weigh up whether he has reasonable quality of life or whether your keeping him here for yourself. All the best  |
| It is a heart wrenching question.....and one without a clear answer. Your vet will guide you.
I put my dog's comfort ahead of my emotional needs. Yes, it tears me apart, but knowing my devoted companion/child is in pain and it cannot be managed is far more heart breaking. Crying and yelping and nothing can control it........no, it's time. Another criteria I use is have they lost their dignity.......a dog that cannot control it's bladder can be diapered, but when they have lost their bowels and are embarassed about it, that is heart breaking. Another.......when the dog no longer enjoys life, has lost the spark, then its time to let them go. Another........when a dog cannot get up on its own and while I don't mind giving boosts, it must be able to motor about once up. If I have to support it for all activities.........and the dog is not suffering from a spinal injury where a wheeled cart could be used........I'm talking about end of life mobility problems, then l let them go to the bridge. Too often we hang on, hoping a miracle happens, the dog rallies yet again, but as we wait the dog suffers. I have waited far too long in some cases and it's another emotional pain for me. Letting them go too early........no, I've not done that, but I do hope I have made the correct decision in most of their cases. Buddy is an absolute cutie.......reminds me of a dog I met on the Navajo Rez I really wanted to bring home............. All I can offer you is at this difficult time. |
| My heart is breaking for you and what you are going through. Poor Buddy and you.
The answer is...follow your heart..you will know when it is time. You will look into Buddy's eyes and he will 'tell' you. And although it will be the most difficult thing you will ever have to do...it is also the most loving and unselfish thing you will ever do. I may be in your shoes soon with my Pearl. At 13, I know that every day is a gift and I do cherish and love her every minute I can as I am sure you are doing with Buddy. |
| I'm sorry you're going through this. My wife and I also went through the same thing. We had problems with rimadyl too, but we had WONDERFUL luck with piroxicam and Tagamet. Without it he could not get up off the floor. Please take the time to read through theese three articles:
http://www.oes.org/page2/27~When_is_enough_enough.html Quote: We have been giving him medicines for the last 4 or 5 years for this... a few years ago the medicines caused a bad stomach, so we stopped the Piroxicam for a while, and went to Rimadyl. The Rimadyl was no good for him, so we stopped completely, and within a week he was completely unable to stand. The break seemed to do good for his stomach, so he went back on the piroxicam along with Tagamet to protect him. http://www.oes.org/page2/200~Old_Age_Me ... _Pain.html http://www.oes.org/page2/6670~Shakes_ba ... blems.html Quote: Our Jake was on pain meds for 5 years due to a combination of HD and DM. The NSAID he was on caused some tummy problems. When we tried the Rimadyl, he had liver problems. so we went off the meds and very soon (days) he was unable to get off the floor. Three days after putting him back on the NSAID (Piroxicam) and CytoTec (to protect his tummy) he was back to his "old" self, no pun intended. |
My heart is breaking for you.  I had to make this difficult decision in May. It really is about the suffering of our darlings. It is true that they will tell you it is time. I looked into Sammy's eyes and she told me she was ready to go and that it was okay for me to let her go. Trust yourself to do the right thing at the right time. |
| I think when yo start ot ask this question you usually know the answer already.
Unless there are other treatments to try that will regain quality fof life for your dog, most people do tend to err ont he side of holding out too long . |
| My heart is hurting with you. We all have been there before, and it is so darn painful but is the price we pay for their unconditional love and trust.
|
| I am so very sorry that you and Buddy are going through this. It is a heart wrenching process and brings me to tears even thinking about it.
I had a Siberian Husky named Marina about 4 years ago; she was my first dog and childhood companion. She also had hip displasia and developed a blood disease at 13. She would get abscess (sp?) wounds on her legs and feet at least once a week... it got to the point where it was unnecessary to take her to the vet every time so I would clean them and bandage them myself, listening to her cry in pain. She too was on Rimadyl.. not for long, a few months at most. One evening she looked terrible.. deep down I knew, but I prayed that in the morning she would be better. I woke up the next morning only to find her stuck in her bed and she'd been unable to get up and go poop
At that point I knew that it was time, she was embarassed and its just not fair. It was one of the most difficult things I have ever had to do. I know what you are going through, as do many others on this forum. It is NEVER easy.. definitely talk with your vet. Quality of life is a key factor. It is so hard to be selfless in this matter when your heart hurts so much. When I was in this position, someone told me that when you take responsibility for an animal, you take care of them their whole lives, making decisions for them based upon what you feel is best, so during this time when they need you most, you have to be strong and make the right choice. Good luck to you, my heart goes out. |
| I'm so sorry you are going through this... I've recently had to make that toughest of all decisions too, and I made it based on the quality of life.
Only you can make the decision on what to do next. |
| As one who just had to make that decision several weeks ago you have my sympathy. I knew it was Luke's time when he could no longer stand on his own. We had been helping him up for months, one day he just wasn't able to stay up. Although I regret that I had to make the call I don't regret that now he is pain free and with his brothers and sister. Sometimes there are just no miracles left Big hugs to you and your boy as you struggle to find the right answer |
| Thanks everyone. It turns out that Buddy has a severe case of degenerative arthritis in his left elbow. The doc wants to put him back on Adequan and gave him a laser treatment on his foot/elbow. I asked him about his quality of life, etc. since both is elbow and hips are now bad (and will get worse) and he didn't offer much help. More that if I didn't want to, or could afford the treatments then I had some soul searching to do.
Buddy is resting a bit more comfortably tonight after his treatment/shot. I'll wait a day or two to see how it goes, but I honestly don't think he's feeling good. He could barely walk across the living room tonight. He was sedated today, so that might be contributing. I'll know in a couple of days. I know I can't afford the $100 + a month treatment/shots to keep him pain-free. I also don't think that they'd give him back his mobility or improve his quality of life. We'll never get back to going on our long walks or playing with the other dogs. Those days are gone. Right now I'm just worried about him spending the rest of his time in pain. I want to thank you all for your thoughts, hugs and prayers. They do mean a lot. |
| Will be thinking of you and your Buddy. |
| The piroxicam/Tagamet is very inexpensive. We found adequan to be wholly ineffective. The piroxicam extended Jake's life by almost 5 quality years or so.
If rimadyl is not an option, I'd try the piroxicam and Tagamet for a week and see how it goes. |
Ron wrote: The piroxicam/Tagamet is very inexpensive. We found adequan to be wholly ineffective. The piroxicam extended Jake's life by almost 5 quality years or so.
If rimadyl is not an option, I'd try the piroxicam and Tagamet for a week and see how it goes. Thanks for the advice Ron... My vet said that Buddy couldn't get other meds like Rimadyl since he is on Prednisone. In fact, Buddy was on both of those when his liver started to fail a few years ago. I only found out that he shouldn't have been on both when I changed vets this year. But maybe I could get him off the prednisone and on the piroxicam/tagamet. I'll check with the vet when I talk to him today. Buddy slept a bit better last night, only crying out a couple of times. But he won't go outside for his walk or even just into the yard this a.m. He did eat/drink finally, but I still cannot interest him in going outside. He hasn't gone to the bathroom since yesterday morning and I'm getting a bit worried. I haven't talked to my vet this a.m. yet. I want to find out how long Buddy was supposed to take before being "better" after his Adequan shot and laser treatment. If he can't give me any better advice (like maybe switching to piroxicam/tagamet), then I think it is time to let Buddy go. I don't think he's happy any more. He will wag his tail when I talk to him, etc... but the spark is going/gone from him. |
| I'm wondering if Tramadol would help Buddy out? I think it can be mixed with Prednisone as it isn't an NSAID. I take it regularly for back pain... maybe it'd help Buddy out too?
Has anyone's sheepie been on Tramadol? How did they do with it? |
| Not an OES, but my daughter's little 12 yr old Min Pin was just on it a couple months ago. (he had suffered a traumatic injury - was on steroids for cervical swelling as well)
Spike did very well on it, he took it just for a week and it showed results very quickly. I would use it again if my dog needed it. |
| We have used it ALOT on quiet a few of our sheepies and it has
always helped! Hope it helps Buddy too! |
| An update on Buddy. I wish it was a good one, but it isn't really. My doc got back in touch and suggested Tramadol for Buddy to help him get over the hump of healing. But that if he still wouldn't get up with the Tramadol on board, then we should start to seriously think of ending his pain.
The prescription is for 100mg three times a day (Buddy is 97 lbs). I gave him his first two last night and he basically freaked out. Heavy panting, agitated, seeming to have to be on the move... but stumbling around. I think he pulled something at one point because he yelled out in pain. I felt so bad for him. I got him calmed down finally and he didn't move all night. This morning, I only gave him 1 tablet (50mg) and he seemed to do better, but he is still refusing to move unless he absolutely has to. No potty trips (he refuses to go outside). He is still limping severely on his left front paw and having trouble getting up and walking. It might take a few days for the meds to kick in for him... don't know. The one tablet seems to help him a bit... but the two at a time seem to do more harm than good. At one point today, when I was able to get him to go outside, he just laid on the ground and stared at me. I don't know if he was telling me enough is enough... or if I'm just reading that into it... to make myself not feel so guilty for thinking of putting him down. I know I have to be strong for Buddy. But dang it is hard. |
| Sorry to hear you both doing it tough. I hope the meds help, it sounds like life is not much fun for either of you right now. |
| Thanks Mim... it has been a long week. |
kermit4161 wrote: I don't know if he was telling me enough is enough... or if I'm just reading that into it... to make myself not feel so guilty for thinking of putting him down.
I know I have to be strong for Buddy. But dang it is hard. Please don't feel guilty! You are trying to help him the best you can and letting him go if he is ready is the most unselfish thing you can do. It's damn hard and it shows how much you love him. |
| Portage was on tramadol for his last five or six months. He was about eighty five pounds when he started, and he did really well with a half pill twice a day (50 mg pills). In his last month we bumped it up to one pill twice a day, and in the last week (there was no use in worrying about long term issues) we did two, twice a day. The vet suggested adding half a T3, twice a day. Ordinarily I'd flip over the possible kidney damage, but we all knew that awful decision was coming soon, and those T3s were great. We had a big Thanksgiving long weekend, and even got some unexpected snow for him to enjoy. (He loves to eat snow, and I was so sad that he wouldn't get to see it one final time...so I was the only Winnipegger thrilled by our "mini storm.")
It sounds to me like your starting dose was really, really high. It's about six times what Portage took for pain, and he did really well for a while. (We had to say good bye to him because of the weakness that finally overtook him, but his pain seemed to be fairly well managed.) Whatever path you follow, I wanted to offer my sympathy and support. Portage has only been gone for a handful of days, and I'm still at the stage where I'm second, third, and fourth guessing myself completely. I understand that we had to do what we had to do, but it's hard to hold back the tears. He had stopped being able to go for walks (his main source of joy) and was starting to show a declining interest in his food. The signs were there, but it still wasn't any easier. I wish you and Buddy all the best. This is the hardest thing in the world. He's lucky to have someone who loves him so much. |
| I have read this thread with a heavy heart. We all know what you are going through and I wish I could help you more. You have to go with your heart and think of your dog. He has loved you all his life and it is obvious you really love him.
Our first oes cross lost the use of her back legs and with help used to stand up. One Saturday we helped her out the garden and she just lay on the lawn and cried. We helped her back in the house and made her comfortable. She didnt move for hours everytime I spoke to her she wagged her tail, but we took her to be pts next morning. We just knew it was the time xxx |
| Thank you everyone for your thoughts, advice and prayers.
Buddy crossed over the Rainbow Bridge at 12:15 MDT today. He curled up next to me on the blanket in the vet's office after he received his first shot, and went to sleep with his head against mine and quietly started to snore. He passed over quietly shortly after that (second shot). I think he knew it was his time to go. I will never forget this day and will hold him in my heart until I cross over. He was a good dog. Alan |
| I am so sorry.....
You stood by your Buddy and he will watch over you until you meet again.
|
| I am so sorry but you did what you had to do. Hugs to you and your family....xxxxxx |
| Oh Alan, I am so sorry to hear that Buddy is over the bridge.
You did all you could for him and he knew it. Thankyou for putting his needs before yours. Wishing you a peaceful heart and happy memories. |
| I am so sorry. He is not in pain now. Hugs to all. |
| Alan, I'm so sorry for this heartache.
He'll always be your Buddy. |
| I am so very sorry for your loss. I know that no words can make you feel better. Just know we're thinking of you here.
Tracie, Gordon, and Hudson |
| So very very sorry for your loss. Special thoughts and prayers for you and your family. |
Alan, I am so truly sorry  . It has always helped me that my dogs knew I was with them as they left this earth and it was my arms that held them so tightly as we said goodbye. I hope you find comfort that Buddy had that same love from you |
| Godspeed, Buddy. You were a lucky pup to have such a great owner.
(too many of these on the forum right now.....) |
| Alan, My heart is very sad for you. I was in your exact same shoes 2 months ago, please know that it does get better and as time goes on, you will be able to focus on the good times, the happy times and the silly times you had with your boy.
Big hugs to you and your family. Brenda |
| Thanks everyone for your support. It has been about three week since Buddy crossed over. I'm still missing him terribly. He was my best friend for 8 years. It just isn't the same coming home without him waiting to greet me at the door. I'm thinking about trying to find another dog... but I guess I'm not ready to let go of Buddy yet (if that makes any sense). I'm sure I will eventually though. Maybe in the Spring.
But thanks again for your help. This was one of the hardest months in my life... and all the worse because I didn't have my partner to help me get through it. |
| You will always love and miss your Buddy, but your sadness will fade over time. Three weeks is still very soon.
|
cynmcreid wrote: You will always love and miss your Buddy, but your sadness will fade over time. Three weeks is still very soon.
I agree give yourself time. As the pain fades a little you will start to remember all the good times you and Buddy had. You'll know when its time for a new friend. They'll never replace Buddy but they help heal the hole in your heart. |
Didn't find exactly what you're looking for? Search again here:
Custom Search
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|