Funny story from Florida trip-hubby and the elderly aunt!
I finally have a minute to post more than a short reply, so, thought I would start with this story, and work my way up to the rest!  ( you KNOW I love to talk) This is going to be long..... 
Ok-- you all know we were in Florida over the holidays. Well, John's Aunt, who is 88 lives close to my Dad's condo. For the last 5 years, we have promised to go visit her, and , well, humm, we haven't. She moved from Ohio 30 years ago, and has been back numerous times for visits, so, we are still in touch etc. She lost her husband of 65 years last fall, so, we really knew we had to make an effort to visit this time. This Aunt is very well to do, lived in a high Victorian house before they moved to Florida, was the mayor of her town when woman didn't do those things... Strong and somewhat over bearing. You don't mess with her-- and she is the "matriarch" even now- so far away... You get the picture. So- we called and made a "date" for New Years Eve day. John talked to her, and , she asked if we liked salmon. Yes- we do. John was thrilled that it was the menu of choice, because he is PICKY, and she cooks very elegant meals, that he doesn't like. Yes- he is a 2 year old. 
The drive was lovely, and I prepared him along the way for asparagus and rice pilaf, which is what I envisioned her serving with the salmon. Pretty tame.... When we got there-we were greated with a white wine- so I am still thinking fish... Well- she asks if we like ham. YES! I love ham. John does not eat ham. At all. GRRR. She is in the kitchen area, and I look and him and mouth " BUCK it up BABY" you are eating ham. He rolls his eyes... We are chatting- and she is telling us about her new "friend" that is a bit younger at 80, but, it seems he is a dear. They have know each other for years, and have both lost their spouse recently. He is nothing to look at, she tells us-- but-- he is kind and gentle. She does NOT want to get married- just have a companion. All the time we are talking - I notice she is putting together shrimp cocktails ... OH NO. John will eat all fish , with the exception, of course of shrimp. I was so close to laughing my pants off, I excused myself and went to the bathroom... When I came back in, there was John- holding his shrimp cocktail, with a look of shear disgust. I mouthed to him "eat it" and he mouths back "it's the ham or this- NOT both! Ok-- I'll give him that. So--while she rattled on in the kitchen- I got up, holding my dish, and walked over to the window by where John was sitting, "to look at the view". He stood up, we kind of put our arms around each other, and , I scooped his shrimp into my dish. Keep in mind- this is one big open area- living room, kitchen, dining room. We had to act fast and be sneaky. Problem solved. Or so we thought. She came in with yet another appetizer. Pate', goat cheese and salmon tatar. AW-- that is where the salmon comes in. This was all served with homemade vegetable crackers. She had put a lot of work into this. I loved it... John- not so much! She had fixed our little plates for us-- so--he was stuck! The goat cheese was strong--- very strong. Ok-- how were we going to fix this one. The tartar was laying loose on the plate. Think fast! I had an idea. I got up with my empty plate, and, went and put my arm around her. She was standing facing the living room. I whirled her around, and pointed to a picture in the dining area. A picture of she and Ted on their 50th anniversary. I kept talking about what a nice pose it was, how they looked so happy, how lucky she was to have had a true love.... I was sincere, but I was rambling to give John enough time to do SOMETHING with the food. Finally he asks where the bathroom is- and I see him fly by out of the corner of my eye. What did he do with it??? When I turned around the plate was empty... You guessed it. He grabbed a tissue, wrapped the food, and flushed it. Yes- I am embarrassed for him. Again, he's a 2 year old.
So- fast forward to the meal. Ham- augratin pototes and aspargus ( I called one dish right! ) I was amazed when John asked for a second helping of potatoes. Then I watched. He was cutting the ham into micro size pieces, and mixing it with his other food. At least he was eating it. Dessert anyone?? I have to say- THIS was a hit. Apple pecan cheesecake with coffee,and a dessert wine. John only had 1 glass of wine-- I had three. My nerves were shot. AND I was stuffed. (Two shrimp cocktails!) We chatted some more, and then we were on our way. She called John's Dad ( her brother) and told him what a dear John was. If she only knew.... AND- she also announced she is getting married!!! WHAT. That wasn't the impression she gave us- at all!!! I guess they are old enough to make their own choices--  We think it's because she noticed how cuddly John and were-- ( at the window, exchanging shrimp) and longs for that again. 
All in all- another fun day in our life.  |
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 I really enjoyed your story. It would make a great skit.  I feel more relaxed having laughed a bit.  I'm at work and this has been another week from hell.  I loved the menu! It would have been very funny to be a fly on the wall. I'm expecting my son for a flying visit tomorrow and have planned baked salmon, among other things. |
| it sounds like john and brian are a lot alike....brian would have eaten the shrimp, but he would have been out on the pate, ham, potatoes AND asparagus....
men, sometimes they are like picky 3 year olds.....sheesh....but at least you have a good story |
Darcy wrote: it sounds like john and brian are a lot alike....brian would have eaten the shrimp, but he would have been out on the pate, ham, potatoes AND asparagus....
men, sometimes they are like picky 3 year olds.....sheesh....but at least you have a good story John ate the tops off the asparagus. That was the best he could do! After wards, I was wishing she had made a london broil. Nice and rare-- with sauted mushrooms, onions and maybe a nice squash soup to start with. John would have faked the flu! |
| Fun story. Can't wait to read more.
Only thing DH won't eat is liver in any form. We haven't tried fresh raw oysters or snails, but with the latter, there's enough butter and garlic he could do it. I was pretty sure DH wasn't picky about food but we did test him before marriage. If it was no on lamb, then no on marriage. With his first bite, I knew he was a keeper. |
| Lol , Your story sure had me chuckling and unbelievably made me incredibly hungry. I would have loved all that food !!! YUM!!!!!
You have a knack for story telling as I could visualize everything as you told it and was cracking up at your ingenious ways of getting rid of that food. Umm your aunt doesn't have internet does she?
Marianne |
| Great story, I'm looking forward to the others! I too visualized the whole thing. |
| That's funny ...and like some others, my husband would have been doing the same thing as well. He has trouble even taking a bite of anything he dislikes unlike me who can eat it for show... Hopefully his aunt's new husband likes all her food. |
Marianne wrote: Lol , Your story sure had me chuckling and unbelievably made me incredibly hungry. I would have loved all that food !!! YUM!!!!!
You have a knack for story telling as I could visualize everything as you told it and was cracking up at your ingenious ways of getting rid of that food. Umm your aunt doesn't have internet does she? Marianne LOL---no- no internet! |
| Great story, Lori! And I must give credit to John, for faking as well as he did! Dale just won't eat anything he doesn't like, which would have been the shrimp, salmon and asparagus. |
| I have to say, I am suprised at all the picky husbands out there! I thought I had dibbs. Makes me feel a little better to hear others would have pouted too. |
Drezzie's Mom wrote: Great story, Lori! And I must give credit to John, for faking as well as he did! Dale just won't eat anything he doesn't like, which would have been the shrimp, salmon and asparagus.
Chuck too. as well as cheese, tomatoes, on and on. |
| I was giggling the whole story... I would have eaten all of that!!! YUM!
Scott is only picky when it comes to tomato-- (as a sauce or salsa it is OK. slices or diced... forget it!) and cooked spinach. He will eat it fresh -think salad-- but not warmed in any way! He would have eaten all that was served that evening!
Loved the story... |
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