Human baby sleep question/help
My baby (5 months) doesn't sleep anymore. I don't know what to do. I'm pretty much at my wits end because my job is very detail oriented, and when you get a total of 3-4 hours sleep (interrupted), it gets very hard to concentrate, not to mention it's just not fun to be this tired. So give me all your best advice and tips. She typically goes down initially pretty well, but usual starts waking up about 2 hours later. For the first 4 hours or so she can typically be soothed by putting her pacifier back in and that's it. But after that she just cries and cries. I usually end up feeding her, which she eats it all, but I also know that she doesn't 'need' to eat during the night. I've heard that you shouldn't pick them up because then it just encourages them to keep on crying because they know mom's coming...but it's the only way she'll stop crying (and it's pretty immediate). Help me  |
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| It's been awhile, but here are some ideas.
Routine - same time, same getting ready for bed routine. Keep a sleep log of her whole 24 hr sleep pattern. If she's at daycare, have your provider keep track too. Maybe she is getting too much sleep during the day? Check with your doctor - can she have any foods yet that may stick with her better to get through the night? Use a lullabye or similar type CD in her room. It will become part of the routine, plus may mask some of the sounds that may wake her up. Or if she wakes up, she can learn to go back to sleep by herself. Also, some sort of white noise, so she doesn't hear you guys moving around in the evening and want to join you. Take her temp - is she getting too hot or too cold? Experiment with different weight PJ's or covers. Good luck. One of my nieces was a horrible sleeper. Her thing was she hated to have ANY pee in her diaper. She woke up and screamed until they changed her......  |
| At 6 months, I AM TOTALLY A BELIEVER IN CIO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What they say is, let them cry for 2 min before entering. Come in, soothe, put paci back in, and then walk out. Then add 2 min increments up to 20 min. Then you can do another 20 min. before entering. The first 2 nights were HELL. Night 3, we watched on the video monitor and had the biggest smiles on our faces as our LO sat back down on the crib and just looked around. Followed by laying down. Oh my gosh, and we thought it would never work!!! It's really not until the 10 min. gaps after day 3 that they worked for us. At that point (after day 2), I went straight to 10 min gap to 20 min gap. Each time it works and I am so amazed AND I CAN SLEEP!!! Also, when they wake up, wait 2 min. before getting them. It's so hard but you have to turn the monitor off and not listen or your heart will take the lead and make ya cave!!!!!!!!!! That's the only way I could do it! I would think since your LO is almost 6 months, you can begin this approach but maybe not so long. The creator of CIO and the method above said to start at 4 months, but he recently came out and changed his opinion to 6 months. I guess research has determined that before that, they run the risk of getting (forgot what it's called) but effects the brain, and you can REALLLLLLLY only get if your lo is left for very long (we're talking 60 min) stretches ALL the time, and more common in newborns. Anyway, 5 months is when my LO did the same thing! Not to mention, everyone kept telling me it was either a growth spurt or teething. Could have been the gs, but it lasted more than a few days so I didn't think so. |
| Can you put a box fan on or some other white noise machine in with her? This was evidently my problem when I was a baby. My mom said she didn't sleep more than 20 minutes at a time for the first 9 months of her life. One day my dad took me out on the riding lawnmower with him to give my poor mom a break and I was out like a light as soon as the motor and vibration started.
I still sleep with a fan on.  |
| Boy does that bring back memories (bad ones). My son was a "fusser" and I don't remember getting more than a few hours sleep at a time til he was almost 2. It was a nightmare.
The only advice i can give is it will, eventually, end. But then they are teenagers and you are losing sleep for a different reason........ |
| Jill, I am SO surprsied to see you in this thread and was even MORE surprised to see you offering a real suggestion, not something like put her in a crate, lol.
I have a CD that has sounds on it (heartbeats, vaccuum, rain), but I can only stand to listen to the rain one, so that goes on loop. We have a pretty consistent bedtime routine (not much to it, just get into night clothes, change diaper, eat, then up to bed, turn on rain machine, stick in paci). And it's not the initial going to bed that's a problem. She's pretty good with that. It's the waking up after this that's the problem. I've been trying CIO a little, and you're right--it's hard! I usually have a set time of 5 minutes before I go in, but last night (or, this morning, rather ) I waited a lot longer before going in. Doesn't seem to matter, except all the hard crying gives her hiccups.
Yeah, I was thinking maybe it's a growth spurt or teething, but I think those would only be in addition to the sleep problem, not the entire cause. She started sleeping badly in the beginning of October when she got sick, and she was sick most of that month, which threw off her sleep schedule since she'd wake herself up because she was congested...and she hasn't slept well since. She maybe has one good night per week (which I can't even enjoy because I'm partly anticipating waking up, and then I don't have to, so the next night I get into a deep sleep and then she wakes me up ) |
barney1 wrote: Jill, I am SO surprsied to see you in this thread and was even MORE surprised to see you offering a real suggestion, not something like put her in a crate, lol.
Actually, I had the same thought! |
| Sullivan was a horrible sleeper. I started a routine.
We have pablum and veggies, then a bath (if I miss the bath, I will be up a few times during the night), a bottle of formula and then bed with his glow seahorse on. I find that the bath is the best thing, he sleeps longer and better after one. I also run a fan (which has been linked to lowering the risk if SIDS). |
| My son (thirty now - so we all survived) was what I think became to be called a high needs baby. he slept maybe 4 or five hours a night from 6 weeks on, did not nap and wanted to be held all the time. letting him cry it out would not have worked with him - he would have truly had a melt down.
I believe Dr Brazelton wrote a book on kids like my son and coined the phrase. I survived by adjusting his sleep hours to mine - we both stayed up until 11 and got up at 5, and we let him in our bed when he was little - I did get more sleep this way. The important thing is to realize no one theory works with all kids and, if your baby is a high needs baby, the good news is they become very self sufficient children. |
Tasker's Mom wrote: barney1 wrote: Jill, I am SO surprsied to see you in this thread and was even MORE surprised to see you offering a real suggestion, not something like put her in a crate, lol. Actually, I had the same thought! My mom still complains to me about it and I'm 33! I am also a chronic insomniac and wouldn't sleep at all without medical intervention so I understand how you must feel. It's like walking around in a haze when you've slept 4 hours in 2 days. |
| One of my sons was 7 mts old before he finally sleep through the night, so I feel your exhaustion. I remember my mil saying that they had to take my hubby out for a car ride to get him to settle down and sleep.
I guess the important thing they tell you is the baby has to learn to put herself back to sleep. DO NOT PUT THE BABY IN YOUR BED....you may never get her out:lol: Good luck and sweet dreams soon. |
| [quote="violet"]
I guess the important thing they tell you is the baby has to learn to put herself back to sleep. DO NOT PUT THE BABY IN YOUR BED....you may never get her out:lol: quote] how American of you |
| Thanks everyone...keep them coming!
I guess one of the worst parts of this is that she USED to sleep through the night, so I got used to it and figured the majority of sleepless nights were over (aside from sickness, etc). So the fact that she isn't sleeping anymore but she used to is hard. She HATES baths, lol. She would kill us (she's getting pretty strong) if we gave her a bath every night! Jill--I don't sleep well and when I do I'm a very light sleeper, so I'm used to this haze, but at least it was my own doing and not caused by someone I can't control 
Yeah, it seems like maybe she has an issue with not being able to self soothe, which means she can't go back to sleep easily on her own. Oh, and she LOVES her paci, but she also loves to play with it and pop it in and out of her mouth with her hands, but she has a hard time putting it back in properly when she really wants it, which of course makes her cry. |
| Sully gets like that when he's going thru a growth spurt. I just lay him on my chest till he falls back alseep.
She hates baths? Thats funny. |
| She doesn't hate baths. She HATES baths. She screams the entire time until I put the towel around her
If this is a growth spurt, she's gonna be a big baby--it's been going on, on and off, for the past 6 weeks... |
| Boy been eons for me since a little bubba who goes to bed well but wakes several times a night.
Have you tried just before bed, keeping the same routine with her and also a few minutes of "Baby Massage" to really relax her. Johnsons has a lovely baby massage oil with a hint of Lavender init to soothe and relax and hopefully send them off to sleep for the entire night. She is probably a little unsettled maybe starting to sprout teeth? If so then that really seems to interrupt there sleep patterns. I always say keep to the same old routine that if they were previously sleeping well then stick to that and try the baby massage as it does relax and soothe them, especially if she is not a fan of a bath before bed, then that should really relax her rather then trying a bath and working her up into a frenzy
Best wishes for a full night sleep mommy  |
| I'm afraid I'm of no help at all. Ryan is 31 and I'm still not sure he has ever slept through the night. We rocked 3 rocking chairs to pieces. He was a large baby 9lbs 7oz and he would wake for a feeding.
I've spent many nights at the dining table with a toddler while he had a bowl of cereal @ 3am and we had some very interesting conversations ( he was very chatty @ that time of night ), when he was 4 or so we would hear a chair slide across the kitchen floor and the cookie jar rattle or the fridge door open for his midnight snack. I'd get up and he'd eat, have a chat and go back to bed. I never thought I'd say it, but I miss those nights.
I guess this is why I now have a terrible time with insomnia. |
| Chaucey Wrote:
Quote: I'm afraid I'm of no help at all. Ryan is 31 and I'm still not sure he has ever slept through the night. We rocked 3 rocking chairs to pieces. He was a large baby 9lbs 7oz and he would wake for a feeding.
I've spent many nights at the dining table with a toddler while he had a bowl of cereal @ 3am and we had some very interesting conversations ( he was very chatty @ that time of night ), when he was 4 or so we would hear a chair slide across the kitchen floor and the cookie jar rattle or the fridge door open for his midnight snack. I'd get up and he'd eat, have a chat and go back to bed. I never thought I'd say it, but I miss those nights. Awe, you made me laugh and then made me want to cry. |
| Morning update:
Better than night before, but still not good. She went to bed at 8:15 with no problem. I don't think I heard her from then until about 3. Then she started fussing. I let her fuss for a few minutes until it developed into full on cries. Then I went in and put in her paci and left, without much interaction. Worked for maybe 10 minutes. Then crying again. I ended up feeding her (I was thinking because she last ate at 7ish, so it had been 8 hours since she'd eaten so maybe she was hungry). Well, somehow the bottle was leaking and I didn't notice it until I went to burp her...she was SOAKED. So I had to find new pajamas, change her, and finish feeding her. So much for limited, quiet interaction. But...what I noticed is that she's WIDE AWAKE during this time. She seems content to play with her paci for a few minutes, but then either drops it and gets upset, or wants company, I can't tell... |
| Our baby board had the same complaints including my own. He gets up, starts talking to himself and plays with his radio ocean thing. But then if I wait long enough, let him go into one of those full on scream-a-thons... he then suddenly stops and konks out. Most of the time w/o paci b/c after all that screaming... he loses it.
W/my first, I always fetched it, but the first never cried. Never. I would just wake up and look at the monitor and see his eyes open and an occasional ...hmmph.. to let us know. He'd stand there for an entire HOUR! |
| I'm certainly no expert, since I've only been at this for 3 months and have only had 3 full nights sleep in that time. One thing I've noticed though is if we put her down to sleep and she starts to stir, things go much better the sooner I get there. If I can get the pacifier back in before she fully wakes up she'll just fall back asleep, if she makes it all the way to full on crying we have to start all over again getting her back to sleep.
I'm in the same boat as you though, she was sleeping until 3:30 and then waking up at 6:30 which was alright, now she is waking up at 1 and 5 which I don't like nearly as much. I'm trying to convince her that she doesn't really need to get up and eat at 1am. Each night is a challenge! Good luck! |
| ha ha--good luck convincing her. There's no reasoning with them! |
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