I need HELP! what do I do?
She is so sad since we lost Flannigan 2 weeks ago. She does not eat much sometimes just 1/2 of her meal. She smells the places where Flannigan use to be and lays there. Even the place his bowl was. Do we get another dog now????? Is it to soon? Will she adjust to being just her? They were GREAT buddies and played all the time. WHAT DO I DO???????????????????????????????????? |
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| I am so sorry for your loss. It is so tough.
We lost one of our two (littermates) in March and it still hurts so much. Our surviving sheepie, Portage, was definitely the follower of the two. He relied a great deal on ThePas to take care of him and make the world a little less scary. Portage did NOT handle the loss of his brother well at all. We had lots of crying and sadness, shaking, and messing in the house. When we'd leave him during the day (something he was totally used to) he'd be a wreck when we got home. It was so hard to go through that in addition to mourning for our sweet Theeps. I lasted eight days before I started looking for another puppy. I wasn't ready emotionally (although I knew we would definitely want another one at some point). I will admit that we felt we had to move up our schedule for Portage's benefit. It's been really good for him but very hard on us. Our new puppy wasn't going to be ready for five more weeks when we put down the deposit, and those five weeks were tough on Portage. During that time, we took him everywhere we went, and tried to keep him super busy. It helped a little, but it was still apparent he was lonely. Hudson's arrival about six weeks ago has really helped him a lot. There have been no further accidents, meltdowns, or panic attacks. The downside of this is that we really weren't ready to move on (I'm still very much in mourning and I have NOT begun to move on). It's taken a lot of thinking and self awareness to keep this all clear in my mind. I love Hudson, but I've had to check my mixed emotions frequently. And I feel like I've somehow dishonoured the memory of our dog Theeps. Portage was a little standoffish at first, but he's really come around and seems to like Hudson now, too. I know they'll be fine. So, I'm sharing this to let you know that there are definite pros and cons to whatever you do. It's hard. I'm not sure if we did the right thing, but I know it WILL be right in time. Hudson is great and we are enjoying him (despite a few puppy quirks). I can't tell you what to do. I just wanted to first share my condolences and then let you know that whatever you do choose, it will be a very mixed set of feelings for you, and for Snowy. All the best to you. Tracie, Portage, and (evil) Hudson |
| When we lost Oliver, Miss Ellie went into a total funk. She ate very little, barely enough to keep going. She would retreat to the basement and not come even when called. We had to carry her upstairs. After two weeks and a lot of worry, we discussed getting another pup, but neither of us were ready.
So I decided to "be" the other dog for Ellie. I know, sounds stupid, but it helped. I set aside time in the evening to be the other dog. I thought long and hard on everything I'd seen while Oliver and Ellie played and interacted. I got on her level (floor) and started playing with Ellie the same way Ollie did (play bow, paws and all, I never did master the Sheepie 500). Ellie must have thought I'd lost my mind the first few times, but three day later when I went downstairs to try to coax her to play she was ready and waiting to have a little bit of attention. Two weeks later she was no longer living in the basement 24/7, and would come to the living room when called. Her appitite started to come around just a bit. She would go for walks and meet other dogs, although a bit timid in her greetings. This went on for about a month and Ellie had improved, but we could tell she just missed Ollie terribly. Filling in for Ollie wasn't going to be the complete solution. Two months after Ollie's passing we found Buffett. We were still greiving Ollies passing as was Ellie, but Buffett's arrival made Ellies greiving so much easier. She needed another dog not a standin. SOA |
Poor thing. Has to be hard to see your dog sad.  I think w/time she will adjust, and unless you were already going to get another dog ...I'd hold out and just concentrate on giving snowy extra love and attn. Hope she feels better soon! |
Im sorry your babie is having a hard time, 
It seems to me they truly greive as we do...
I wish you well, and a happy solution at this sad time, |
| I would be thinking in the direction of another dog. We can rationalize our pain but a dog lives in the right now and right now he's in pain. In the mean time get him out (if you can) seeing new sights, smelling new smells.
When our Newf died, his buddy Shane moped around even though we had other dogs. He had lost his best friend. Not long after.....6 months....he came down with bone cancer. Coincidence or did the grieving cause it, accelerate it? I don't know. I just know he was never again the happy boy he was when he and Abbott were a team. |
| I watched Melody sink into a deep depression when Phoebe suddenly died. We were finally able to get Isaac about 7 weeks later & Melody looked at me as if to say "YES!!!! You finally understood what I was trying to tell you!" They were best buddies for the rest of her life |
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My Quin just lost his two best friends last month I am so sorry for your loss but, she may be feeding off of your sadness. I know Quin hates to see me cry so, I am doing more with him to get him through! More visits to the park(hard since it so hot!) Okay more visits to McDonalds (hard since he is an allergy dog) We just take rides... ....I sing to Quinnie! How old is Snowy??? It is so HARD but, try to be happy for Snowy |
| Snowy was 1 on May 22, and we are giving her lots of love and attention. |
| Your post has made me cry. I have only experienced this with my first 2 Yorkshire terriers. When Tammy died aged 12 and a half Pepper couldn't bear it. She lay on the pillow next to my head and groomed my hair. She messed in the house, we didn't realize she didn't know how to ask to go out the garden. She was inconsolable. I spoiled her something rotten. She had the run of the house, we took her everywhere with us, and she ate human food. She went on to live another three and a half years. It just wasn't the right time for us to get another dog, but after 6 months she had adjusted. In the circumstances now I would just get another dog, but we are all different and you need to do what is right for you. Hugs. xx |
| Snow is still a puppy! They react worse to emotional situations as they are still young. Good for you, you get to change her. Up your time and play with her. Time to teach her a few more tricks, devise games between the two of you, find ways to keep each other entertained. Come up with something new and fun......a tea party in the yard where you and she sit on a blanket and eat cookies together, you read to her and brush her.......something entirely new and fun. |
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