What's the best way to beg for something you want?
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| I just go out and GET IT |
| I take my shirt off. |
ButtersStotch wrote: I take my shirt off.
There was a day that worked for me but now............................ I'm just too darn old  |
| Okay, what if you need the funds the other one has to help you in your endeavour? And he's too tired at this point to notice me taking my shirt off! I need sneaky tricks...
AND, it is all YOUR best interests if I get what I want... |
Well, I'm certainly intrigued!!  But, I don't have any wily secrets to share that might help you. 
I will wish you good luck, though!  |
| Have you tired TEARS? |
| I think my method would vary depending on what I wanted. Can you give us a hint as to what you're angling for or amount of funds that you need? |
A PUPPY  ? |
| I agree with Ginny. Barney decided he needs a little bro or sis! |
| Joan and I have never had a single argument where one spouse has said "no" to the other's desired purchase. Let me explain.
We have a rule that if a spouse feels really strongly about not doing something that they are allowed to veto anything. It has never been invoked, and next week will be our 21st anniversary. Now, it isn't like we're always on the same page; we've discussed things and have decided to or not to go forward, but we're always in the same book. It has never come down to the veto. It's usually more like "If you want it, get it." Does that count as begging? It's not because we are rich or anything, this has been true throughout our relationship. We are very compatible financially. |
Well, Cam and I are NOT compatible financially 
And someone, I believe it was Ginny, might be on to something...
Basically, I would need help financially from him in order to get what I want...I don't have the entire funds myself...but together, as married entity We do... |
| You could do what I did the last time I wanted a puppy........ I told Doug it was either a puppy or a baby, HE JUMPED at the puppy!!!!!!!!!!!! |
| Awwww Ron! Happy anniversary for next week.
Somehow Greg and I seem to have the same ideas BUT... if there is something I really want and I don't think he will agree (I hope he doesn't read this) then I spend a few days skirting round the subject, just bring up very subtle hints. In a few days he will think it was his idea, when he asks me about it I say "ooohhh thats a good idea honey, I wish I'd thought of that!" It takes a bit of work, but it's better than a fight. And It's not done in a nasty way, I love him very much
He hasn't said no to anything yet. I think if I really wanted something, and I kept on about it enough he would eventually give in anyway. |
| I'm assuming it's in the puppy family because you know better than to beg about a baby!
I would think of all the reasons that he didn't want it and then think of how I could help alleviate that worry. When we got Bear, I made a deal with James (after talking with the rescue), that we'd foster him for a week and reevaluate how he worked in our household. This sounds much more reasonable than I am normally willing to be because I knew he'd love Bear and it would work out. Just make him think he has the power (like all women do) and it will work out in your benefit. |
Tasker's Mom wrote: You could do what I did the last time I wanted a puppy........ I told Doug it was either a puppy or a baby, HE JUMPED at the puppy!!!!!!!!!!!!
See, I'd have the opposite reaction from him! He'd want the baby... |
| Well then, tell him he can have a baby if you can have a puppy |
| i dont know what you need, but what i do is have a stash of cash....slowly save over the months....when i have enough, i tell brian that im going to buy it.....he usually says "Im not paying that much for THAT.." and i pull out the wad of cash...and say "you dont have to...i have it all right here"....usually that quiets him up.......if that doesnt work the shirt off usually does |
Doesn't he ever wonder how you've earned such a wad of cash????  |
| Doug and I have entirely seperate bank accounts and we each have our own savings account. (different banks even). He pays some of the bills and I pays some. As long as the bills are paid we never question what the other spends. When it comes to big purchases who ever wants it the most usually pays for it (he bought the generator I bought the couch).
Doesn't work for everyone but it works for us. |
| no he knows that i do it now..after the first 2 times....saved enough for a new dining room table and chairs...that was about 9 months of saving...and the living room sofa...that was 6 months of savings.....now he just asks how much i have in there.....i also sometimes use it to buy shoes...hehehe
i did blow him away the first time....he couldnt say no per se, but he did say that i had to sell our existing table and chairs for no less than 500 dollars...well it was a maple table with captains chairs in perfect condition....but not in too many peoples style...i couldnt get an offer for more than 300 so i sold it for that and added 200 of my stash cash and gave it to brian.....everyone was happy |
| hahahahaha, Darcy that sounds like something I would do!!!!!!!!!!!! |
| I kinda like the sound of that maple set... |
| Hi, what about showing him the puppies...who could resist an oes puppy. He will fall in love with it |
Ron wrote: I kinda like the sound of that maple set...
yuck....it was his mothers from the fifties....and the reason that it was in mint condition was that he kept a vinyl tablecloth with cows and sunflowers over it......i ''gave'' them that for free |
| I would just come right out and ask him....no beating around the bush.....that's what works for my hubby and I anyway. For example...I too, am REALLY thinking about getting another Sheepie since our Roxy girl passed away almost 2 months ago. My husband knows I really want another sheepie...and he does too...but he is not sure if he is quite ready. We both really miss Roxy alot....and know we will be owned by another sheepie one day. We have decided to wait until "both" of us are ready.......since taking care of, and loving another sheepie would be a joint effort. My hubby needs to be able to grieve at his own pace, if you will.....and I respect that and don't want to push him into anything. I know tho, as soon as he sees another one of those big clown mugs...he's lible to change his mind in a hurry.  But....if there is something one of us wants...(small purchase)...we just buy it. In the case of a large purchase....we don't get it unless both agree to do so. I think that in the case of getting another living, breathing creature that is going to rely on you to love and take care if them for the rest of thier lives, should be agreed on by both.
Gosh....aren't you glad you asked??? |
Quote: Doesn't he ever wonder how you've earned such a wad of cash????
OMG, too funny Ron! |
jcc9797 wrote: Quote: Doesn't he ever wonder how you've earned such a wad of cash???? OMG, too funny Ron! |
Tasker's Mom wrote: Doug and I have entirely seperate bank accounts and we each have our own savings account. (different banks even). He pays some of the bills and I pays some. As long as the bills are paid we never question what the other spends. When it comes to big purchases who ever wants it the most usually pays for it (he bought the generator I bought the couch).
Doesn't work for everyone but it works for us. Us, too. The only difference is that we also have one joint account that we both put a predetermined amount of money in each month. It's "our" money. We use it for vacations or big projects that are for both of us. Then, if we have something on the horizon, like a big purchase, we just talk about it and up the amount we put in the shared account. Otherwise, I don't really care what he spends his money on and vice versa. The dogs have always been my responsibility but, for some reason lately, he's been leaving money on the table for me to buy food and stuff for them. I think it's kinda sweet, like he officially "adopted" them now that we're married. I'm not complaining either because those three aren't cheap! |
Tasker's Mom wrote: Doug and I have entirely seperate bank accounts and we each have our own savings account. (different banks even). He pays some of the bills and I pays some. As long as the bills are paid we never question what the other spends. When it comes to big purchases who ever wants it the most usually pays for it (he bought the generator I bought the couch).
Doesn't work for everyone but it works for us. That's what we do too. Although most of his bills relate to child support from his first marriage . We are complete opposites when it comes to managing money. I'd like to retire as soon as possible so I save. He's more of the instant gratification shopper.
Barney1, why doesn't your husband want another puppy? |
ButtersStotch wrote: Tasker's Mom wrote: Doug and I have entirely seperate bank accounts and we each have our own savings account. (different banks even). He pays some of the bills and I pays some. As long as the bills are paid we never question what the other spends. When it comes to big purchases who ever wants it the most usually pays for it (he bought the generator I bought the couch). Doesn't work for everyone but it works for us. Us, too. The only difference is that we also have one joint account that we both put a predetermined amount of money in each month. It's "our" money. We use it for vacations or big projects that are for both of us. Then, if we have something on the horizon, like a big purchase, we just talk about it and up the amount we put in the shared account. Otherwise, I don't really care what he spends his money on and vice versa. Us too. I have mine and he has his. The biggest problem I'm having with this whole situation is that I don't have enough of 'my' money to be able to say Well, I'll just get it myself. Which is why he comes in... But we are moving this month and do have a lot of expenses that are going to be coming up, so it'll be extra hard to convince him than in normal times...must think of a way! |
Bailey's Mom wrote: Tasker's Mom wrote: Doug and I have entirely seperate bank accounts and we each have our own savings account. (different banks even). He pays some of the bills and I pays some. As long as the bills are paid we never question what the other spends. When it comes to big purchases who ever wants it the most usually pays for it (he bought the generator I bought the couch). Doesn't work for everyone but it works for us. That's what we do too. Although most of his bills relate to child support from his first marriage . We are complete opposites when it comes to managing money. I'd like to retire as soon as possible so I save. He's more of the instant gratification shopper.Barney1, why doesn't your husband want another puppy? Actually Sue, that is WHY we do it the way we do. Doug pays more child support and alimony than anyone I EVER knew, add to that the constant demand for "things" from his kids and I decided a long time ago that I just didn't need to know about it. Doug is also a spender and I'm a "saver". If he had ANY IDEA how much I have in my savings account he'd be wanting to spend it on something |
Bailey's Mom wrote: Barney1, why doesn't your husband want another puppy?
Let's assume that's what I was talking about...I don't know. I think he feels like it'll be too many animals. You know, when they outnumber the humans, they might take over...Plus, as much as he loves Barney, I think he sometimes thinks he's too drippy from his beard and stuff...We currently have 3 cats and 1 dog...I don't think an extra dog is too much else to ask for, right? I mean, sheepdogs don't get very big, right?
Plus, I'd be willing to give my brother back his cat if I could get this puppy... |
| Do you have anything you could sell????? (like maybe the cats ) |
| My husband's buddies all think he is nuts. We have a joint account, and he knows NOTHING about how much money we have, how much the bills are, nothing. He calls me before he makes purchases, most of the time, just to make sure we have the available funds. Most of his friends have seperate accounts from their wives, a couple actually give their wives an allowance, to cover bills and food and maybe a few incidentals. I guess quite a few military men are this way. I couldn't handle that, lol. When I worked before we had our son, the money was always both of ours. Just like it is now. Anyways, good luck on your puppy! Tell him how happy it would make you. Hubby's always wanna make their wives happy, right? |
| Joan and I just like the idea of our funds "co-mingling" |
Ron wrote: Joan and I just like the idea of our funds "co-mingling"
I like that one
Hubby works....I stay home with the kids....its OUR money...he makes it...I spend it.... we are both good at what we do
Hubby thought we had enough dogs too....then I said..I'm getting another sheepie.....he said from where...I told him...he said 'cool'... end of discussion.....(and yes I am spoiled) Plus after 22 years of marriage we have learned...nothing is that important over fighting about.... |
Quote: Hubby works....I stay home with the kids
Are you kidding me? Staying home with the kids is a full-time job, with overtime! You should get to spend money, just think of how much he would have to pay someone else to watch the kids! |
WizardMerlin wrote: Ron wrote: Joan and I just like the idea of our funds "co-mingling" I like that one |
| We are the comingled money too. One account, all the money goes into it. Of course, it does help that we married young, had no debt seperate from each other, no child support, or anything like that.
I pay the bills - Todd has no clue or desire to know. We both just warn each other if we would like to make a big purchase - just to make sure the money is there! Anything significantly expensive gets talked over first. BTW - the laundry comingles at our house too...... |
| Amen on the spoiled part, honey! I am very spoiled. I feel so mean, hubby will ask for something, and I'll say no, too expensive, but anything I want, he tells me to get! I am very good at talking myself out of stuff now, except for George, had to have George! |
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