New OES (18 months) scared of men
I've been reading about your issues with stubborness and selective hearing. I came on this site hoping for some information. Our 17 year old daughter has wanted an OES for a long time (cause they're big and because they're fluffy!). I did a bunch, I thought, of research on the internet to find out about them. I kept my eye on the newpaper and on websites. We couldn't afford a real expensive dog. Then one day, in the paper there was an ad for an OES 18 month old neutered male. We went to see him. The couple that owned him had like 8 or 9 dogs and they said that was nothing, that they have had up to 37 at one time. Different breeds. She's a vet tech, he works at a school. Anyway, they were moving from here (the Northwest) back to the mid-west and couldn't take all the dogs, only some. Anyway... Basil was extremely shy. That's just an understatement! He hid under a lamp table and peed himself and shook. But he was gentle and didn't growl or bark and he let us pet him. To make a long story short we bought him and brought him home. Here are his behaviors and do you have any information about this breed and any advice? We are going to take him to obedience classes with our daughter this summer when school is out. Basil is: Terrified of strangers Peed himself for weeks around our three sons and my husband. Adored our daughter from the first moment. He sat with her on the way home and slept on her bed for weeks. Now he sleeps in a crate. Never complains about the crate. Still scared of our three boys ages 19, 11 and 11 (twins) will occasionally let them pet him, but 5 minutes later if they come back he jumps and runs Warmed up to me right away Has now warmed up to my husband. Very hard to control in the yard Very hard to walk with. My husband walks him, but my daughter gets pulled down the street. I guess I should say he has never really been scared of women strangers, just the men. Do you think he was abused? The couple actually got into a really mean and scary argument right in front of us when we were at their house over some rubbermaid container she couldn't find - the man was really cruel and hummiliating to the wife. We have had Basil since March 26 He never comes when we call him, never How can we help him learn to trust and love the boys? Will the obedience classes help with the walking and jumping and leaping around the house and onto our bed (he does get down immediately when I say no, but he comes back and does it again) We adore him. I think he is really smart...like he thinks like a human not a dog. But he has a wall up around him and won't quite let us in. What do you think. If I can figure out how I will add a picture of Basil. He is very handsome and strapping. |
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| Welcome to the forum! I removed your other post as guest.
I'm glad you've asked this question, I've wondered about it myself. I hope others with more experience will jump in and help us to understand this behaviour. Perhaps it will continue to improve, but I'm afraid that some may just never get over this kind of timidness from puppyhood traumas. I fostered a very timid boy; he was just the absolutely sweetest thing and extremely eager to please. His furever parents tell us that he is still quite timid, but they love the heck out of him. He's just different than they expected. |
| He may always timid and frightened, but I had a cat once that started out like your puppy. After a few years and lots of love he became the cat that all other cats will be compared to. Patence is a great thing. When I was working with him I tried to remember what my mother would say to us, to never be mad when they don't come and always be happy when they do come. She said that worked withkids and pets. The funny thing about my cat was that after a while he loved being around men. Basil has only been with you a month.
Good Luck and loads of patence |
| My Maggie is very timid by nature (no one believes me but it is true). When I got her, she was afraid of men, peed when scared, afraid of loud noises, and generally completely unresponsive to human voice. She wasn't quite as scared as your boy but she definitely had issues. With lots of love, training, and patience, after about six months, she was considerably better. Now, 18 months later, she is still a bit timid but she has learned good coping mechanisms. She is eager to greet people and have fun.
I recommend changing his name if that name might be associated with an abusive past. Get a good training book and teach him the basics like he is a puppy. The one that worked best for us is "My Smart Puppy" because it was so positive. The exercises are fun. Keep him on a tether at all times so he learns to look to you for what he is expected to do. There are tons of strategies for dealing with pulling on the leash. Mine is to use a gentle leader and to stop whenever Maggie tries to lunge ahead. If she keeps doing it, I block her and make her sit, lie down, etc. -- various commands to reinforce that I am in control (there are great strategies in My Smart Puppy.) Some people use treats to keep them in position. That never worked for highly distractable Maggie. He may never be completely outgoing and confident, but I believe that he can learn to trust that you and your family will keep him safe. You should expect that the progress will not be completely straightforward but just anticipate that each month will be better than the last. Your dog is at an age where he will be testing you to see what his role is so you need to be really consistent even if he isnt. Good luck and keep us posted. |
| Poor Basil, sounds like he has had a rough start to life for what ever reason. I believe that part of personality is genetic and part is environmental, what percentage is what is anyones guess. But take a genetically timid dog and start him in a bad environment and you've got a basket case on your hands.
I doubt that his previous owners would consider themselves abusive but I don't know how anyone could care for thritysomething dogs and take proper care of them. Basil has grown up in a "pack" and appears to have learned very early that he is low man on the totem pole. It sounds like he has had a bad experience with men somewhere along the line as well. My Tasker was only 3-4 months old when I got divorced. He was 6 weeks old when he came to live with us. You do the math but he spent very limited time around my ex, who was not a nice person. But now 12 years later he is still VERY WARY and mistrusting of men, especially strangers. WHen I take him to the kennel I have to warn them not to allow a strange male to care for him. He is a sweet heart to women anbd once he knows a man is "safe" is also good but somewhere deep inside him he is programed for intital mistrust of men. I like Val's suggestion of changing his name, I would have never thought of it. I would also suggest that one of your boys or husbandtake over the feeding and care of Basil. That will reinforce that all men aren't bad. Be sure to use a POSITIVE REINFORCEMENT training technique, never scold or punish if at all possible. At 18 months your guy is essentially a "pre teen", think of the emotional needs of a "pre teen". My guess is that with lots of positive reinforcement, LOVE, and stability he will settle in. He will most likely always be a timid pup but that doesn't mean he cannot grow to love and trust your family. GOOD LUCK. |
| Hi, and welcome to the forum.
Submissive peeing can/may be overcome as Basil develops more confidence around the family. Rather than petting him on top of the head, try scratching him under his chin. Obedience training may also help boost his confidence. You may want to try the Gentle Leader for walking him. This should help stop your daughter from being dragged down the street. Another collar that I've heard good things about is the Illusion Collar from Cesar Milan (I haven't tried it myself yet). As for jumping and running around the house....well, he's only 18 months old so he's still full of youthful energy. Obedience training will help a bit. Making sure that he gets enough exercise will help more. Try taking him for long walks (I take mine for a two mile walk in the morning, and another mile and a half in the evening). And last, I agree on changing the name. We just got in a foster that supposedly wouldn't respond to his name. We changed it....and he responds beautifully. Good Luck Jennifer, Baxter, Cassiopia and Sharkey |
| another great training book I have been reading is Before & After Getting Your Puppy, by Dr. Ian Dunbar. He has tons of suggestions for socialization, housetraining, walking etc. I hope all works out well. |
| Just a thought... note that I am NOT a trainer.
If your pup is terrified of men, how about having all of the guys completely ignore him. As Cesar would say, "No touch, no talk, not eye contact." Have them walk through the room as if he weren't even there and toss a treat in his direction. Have them sit down and toss out small super-fabulous treats to him like a machine but without ever acknowledging he's there. Make no quick moves that might be interpreted as threatening. When the food is gone, have them slowly stand and walk away from him. When he's comfortable with this, maybe after several days even, you might try this- Gradually toss the food closer and closer until he takes it off maybe the top of their foot or knee, then finally out of their hand. But have them make no attempt to pet him or even look at him or you may set him back and the trust will have to be rebuilt. The idea is for him to begin viewing ALL men as a source for good things. When a man is around, good things happen to him. If they make no demands on him, he won't feel forced into a confrontation... he may ease into a relationship on his own terms and once he understands guys can be pretty cool. Later, once he's accepted the boys, do a round-robin type game. You all stand in a circle and call him to you using the "come" command, rewarding with a SMALL special treat. You might wait until an hour or so before meal time so he's good and hungry. Note: NEVER call him to you in order to scold him. You might also consider clicker-training to get him to come. You "load" the clicker this way- click - immediately give a treat - click - treat - click -treat, etc. Repeat this several times. Once he understands that a click= treat he may come running the next time you click. It's not the best method but until you've built the trust needed, it might be a short term solution. Note that it can take MONTHS to build trust and for a dog to settle in... it took our Panda about 6 months but she had a whole 'NOTHER set of issues 
As for jumping on the bed, put a leash on him and anticipate his move to get up on the bed. NOTE: Don't leave him unattended however with a leash... it can be a choking hazard. I'm sure you can see him considering the jump... give the leash a tug (not a jerk but a tug) or touch his side and say "off" or "uh-uh". It's too late to correct him when he's in mid-air so break his focus BEFORE he takes flight  . You may want to observe him a few times so you can "learn the dog"... it will allow you to make the correction at the best time. You might consider putting a blanket on the floor near the bed where HE can lie down. When he attempts to get on the bed, make the correction, take him on his leash over to his blanket and have him lie down. Maybe have a Nylabone or special toy that he gets when he's on his blanket.
I hope something here helps. Others here can probably give you more help. Good luck to you! |
| ^^^ Great ideas ^^^ |
| Really awesome suggestions!
I have used the gentle leader with success before with some fosters - just make sure you read the instructions on how to properly fit it. It reminds me of a halter for a horse, only for a dog. I'm glad you were able to help this boy out - sounds like he needed it a lot. I am a huge advocate of obedience training. However, in your particular case I would make sure to talk to the potential instructor about your boy's issues and get advice first. If he is as terrified of strangers as he sounds he might be over-powered in an obedience class right off the bat. Perhaps a female instructor could work with you at home one-on-one until he is ready for the big leap. As I'm sure you already know, make sure the potential instructor is using positive training. Good luck! |
| There were already given some excellant points that I would like to empathize, and couple things I'd like to add.
6girls mentioned the boys ignoring him completely. That is exactly what you need to do. Her step-by-step approach is what is needed, and don't move ahead quckly. It may take weeks or even months, but better go very slow then to suffer a setback. And he may never be OK with strangers....but you do want him to look to YOU for guidance. Tasker's Mom mentions both genetics and environment affecting this dog and defining the resulting behavior. This is exactly what I was thinking. Without knowing his parents and thier parents, the genetic part is a complete unknown, so it is impossible to know if he will eventually be an outgoing confident fellow. Somehow I doubt it. With the jumping and bouncing he needs excercise and to learn manners. When my Dixie gal came to stay with me, from living with 60 some other dogs, she was like a wild animal. We almost called her Tigger, she was so bouncy. I would ignore the unwanted behavior and reward what you like. Get him a bed or blanket and teach him "go to your bed" by saying the words and tossing a tiny treat onto it. Freeze his food into a large Kong and give it to him on his bed. Make his bed the best place to be. Teach him "down" and whenever he is lying down by himself, toss him or walk over and give him a special treat. I would not restrain a dog like Basil, but let him have whatever freedom he needs right now to "get away" if he is afraid. Dixie was terrified of the vacum cleaner for the longest time. She would panic and leave the room and fight to get outside. I always just let her be, but never made a big deal about it. It took a while, but now she will just go under the desk and watch the "evil thing". Val's experience with Maggie is something to learn from. She came along very well with structure, routine and excercise. I would recommend any book by Dr. Ian Dunbar. There is also an online yahoo group called Shy K9's or something like that. I LOVE clicker training. It gives the dog something to think about besides their fears. I would also change his name. I would enroll in an appropriate obedience class...One with an understanding trainer, that is not too crowded or overwelming, and that uses only positive methods. That will help with the communication, and once you have established cues...either hand signals or voice, they can be introduced to the rest of the household....again, to help in the communication area. Hope this helps. |
6Girls wrote: If your pup is terrified of men, how about having all of the guys completely ignore him. As Cesar would say, "No touch, no talk, not eye contact." Have them walk through the room as if he weren't even there and toss a treat in his direction. Have them sit down and toss out small super-fabulous treats to him like a machine but without ever acknowledging he's there. Make no quick moves that might be interpreted as threatening. When the food is gone, have them slowly stand and walk away from him.
Buffett came to us 6 months ago and was completely terrified of my boys , children and strangers. It's been slow going but the ignore/treat method is finally starting to convience Buff that the boys are not Sheepdog serial killers  and the neighborhood kids might be OK. Hang in there. |
| I can't tell you how much all of your suggestions have meant to us. We are going to start working on some of them right away. The kids and I have been reading and my daughter was thrilled to get to change his name. Don't laugh - she named him Chewbaka since Star Wars is her favorite. She calls him Chewie for short. Amazingly enough is he started responding right away. We're headed this weekend to get some books suggested and find the Gentle Leader. The boys have been trying to give Chewie treats. Sometimes he takes them and sometimes not but usually when he does he sneaks away and hides under something or behind something. So we're going to try the suggestion from 6girl. My daughter plays in the back yard with Chewie everyday and lets him run and play. We have a 15 week old Golden Retriever female puppy who adores him and he loves to play with her. So our daughter runs and plays with them but maybe with the Gentle Leader she and I can take him on our daily walk. I know this may sound silly, but I have cried and gotten so emotional from all your help and suggestions because we've been so worred about Chewie. We love him so much it hurts to see him scared. We have already been very careful about not scolding him. He usually gets down from the bed when I say down. Then he curls up next to the bed. We'll have to get a big bed/blanket for him. I do think we are confusing him so I'm not usually upset when he jumps on our bed because he's allowed to be on our daughters bed. He likes it because she has a bunk over her full size bed. Again...thank you so much. I also really appreciate all the other info on this forum. |
| We would never laugh at a dog's name. Funny enough, there is another Chewie on this forum! Well, Chewie's mom is on the forum as "got sheep." I have no advice, but wish you good luck and I'm sure Chewie will get more comfortable now that he is in a loving, secure environment. Please post pics if you can--we love pictures! |
| Sannejon,
Welcome to the forum and thank you for rescuing Chewie from the terror that has been his life until now. You and your family are one of the "special ones" to do this, thank you on behalf of all the abused and neglected puppers. You have been given a lot of very good advise so far in the thread and I'm glad to see you have taken it in such a positive way. I would however caution you not to go too fast or try to address too many issues at a time. As has been mentioned Chewie is clearly a very submissive dog through both genetics and environmental factors. His peeing is very clearly a sign of submission and his "fear" of your sons reflects the environment in which he was raised. It will take a long time to mitigate this and there is no way to know how much you can "bring him around". Anyway, a few thoughts on Chewie-male upright interactions. Clearly the "husband", and I use the term very loosely, was loud, dominating and potentially physically abusive so that is the model Chewie has of men. He has known nothing else in his life to date. His warming to your husband shows that he is able to interact with men, at least to some extent. I suspect he hasn't warmed up to your sons because they are quite simply typical boys, active, loud and boisterous both in and out of the house. Without meaning to they reflect some of Chewie's past and he is reacting accordingly. If at all possible your boys need to be calmer in the house while Chewie adjusts and starts to learn that they are not a threat to him. They also need to be very patient with Chewie and not "impose" themselves on him. Let Chewie make the first moves after he has seen them interact favorably with you, your daughter and husband who he already trusts - especially you and your daughter as his bond to you two is apparently much stronger. When he begins to investigate your boys then they should begin to "work" with him. While I always recommend against children getting down to the dog's level, in this case, and ONLY this case I will say otherwise. In one-on-one sessions have your sons sit on the floor and quietly/gently entice Chewie with a treat. It may not work for a number of sessions but both you and your sons need to be patient. It may even be necessary for you or your daughter to sit with a son to help re-inforce Chewie's confidence and have a "safe fallback" if he looses his nerve. Soft happy tones of voice and a calm face are essential to building up Chewie's self-confidence. Once he accepts treats (use very small to die for treats - TDFs) then the son can begin to touch and pet Chewie. Never put their hands over his head - that will immediately trigger submission - and never try to hold him when he wants to move away. That would be a domination which would scare him. Keep any petting very soft and gentle, you don’t know if Chewie was physically abused so you don’t know what his reaction to physical contact from a male will be or even if he has untreated injuries from abuse. If he is hurt and has pain he could “fear-bite” trying to escape. As well as petting your sons can start interacting with Chewie using a toy he really likes. Let Chewie get the toy often and be very gentle when taking it back to start the game over. From there move on to your son offering treats while sitting on a chair or sofa. This starts to raise their height without being threatening or overly dominating to Chewie. As that is accepted again start petting from the sofa or a chair. Slowly get to having a son offer treats and attention from the standing posture. Finally, I recommend going through this process with one son at a time. To try to do this with all three at once would be overwhelming and could do more to reinforce the submissive behavior that you are trying to overcome. At no time should anyone stand over Chewie and certainly don’t stand over him to scold him. Use positive reinforcement training techniques. Second, don’t rush into obedience or other training classes. Chewie may need a lot of time to become comfortable in large group settings, especially where there are men present! Work with him at home and monitor his reactions to being taken outside for a walk. How does he respond to strangers he meets? When he can deal with that then training classes may be appropriate. Also be very careful with the gentle leader. It can be very useful and many people offer testimony of how much it has improved their walking experience. But there is also the potential for a lot of injury if Chewie panics and tries to run from a situation that scares him. Personally I would “back-up” the gentle leader with a regular leash and collar. If he does try to run from a threatening situation (and you will probably have no warning of this reaction) drop the gentle leader leash and the regular collar/leash will restrain him without injury. Shy and fearful dogs will always be limited in how they interact with non-family members and outside the home. Sometimes you cannot overcome their trauma and you simply have to give them the best “cloistered” life you can. You see when I was young our first Afghan Hound, a truly sweet and lovely little girl was absolutely terrified of the world. We don’t know why, she came that way, but within the family she was very loving and happy. She hated daytime walks, everything scared her, she just wanted to go home. At night she was happy to go out to walk and play when nobody else was around. Even getting a very outgoing Afghan “sister” didn’t bring her out of her paranoia. So we accepted who she was and did the best we could to give her a happy life on her terms. Sometimes she would go out and “deal” with strangers and eventually she even got to where she would trust people who visited our house repeatedly (8-10 visits down the line) but she was always shy and scared. I’ve never met another dog so badly traumatized as her and chances are Chewie can do much better. Just be willing to accept that there may be substantial limits on how much Chewie will “come around” in spite of your diligent and extended efforts. As ever don’t hesitate to post more questions as you need help and let us know how your family and Chewie are progressing. We all live vicariously through each other in this global Bobtail family! Thanks and Cheers Carl. |
| NOT that you would want to get another dog but you might consider having him around dog and people friendly dogs (if he himself is dog friendly).
I've got a Border Collie-mix named Maggie that was SUPER submissive. We adopted her about 9 years ago from the local Humane Society... we think she was around 4 months old. Today, she's is what we consider #1 in the pack. This is the dog that would roll over as submissive, was super shy, also head-shy (not wanting to be pet on the head), would bark and back away from strangers. I continue to tell people to ignore her when the arrive and she'll come up to them. Our sheepies have always been super friendly and adore people (though they can be rather rambunctious the first 5 minutes... sigh). I believe that Maggie learned by watching these girls interact with strangers that they were ok. She got to the point that she WANTED to take part in the greeting. She would whine because she too wanted to be allowed to join in the fun. Another thing we did with her was to put a tennis ball in the had of whomever came through the door. This dog is ball crazy and we found she would warm up super fast if they would play ball with her. (We don't have many visitors... wonder why that is??? )
I think Chewie probably needs repetitive positive encounters to build on. By the way, Chewbaka is a fine name... may the Force be with you!
Good luck and just don't try to rush the process. |
| Hi - I'm Dawn, with the other Chewie!! Our Chewie is named after Star Wars too. He is a hairy Chewbacca for sure, and to carry it one step further, our Chewie's dad is Shaggybear's Skywalker, with the call name of Luke. So we really had no choice!
We have a shy dog too - it is Maggie, my husband's bluetick coonhound. She was removed from an abusive situation by a friend of mine in basset rescue. (My friend Mel coonhunts too) Maggie was about a year old, chained out and kicked/hit and starved by her previous owner. Mel got her last November, and she came to our house in January. She is improving, but it takes time. She totally loves my husband now - she knows she is his! She is still leary of other men, but is making progress. This is Maggie out with Chewie, Simon the basset and Riley the rat terrier - 
Our other abused dog is Tazz, a min pin. He was only in his abusive home until he was 11 months old, but he was a TOTAL basket case. His breeder found out and took him back, and she is a friend of the family. Her vet was so upset over Tazz's state, that she said the kindest thing would be to put him to sleep. My daughter needed a dog to train for 4-H, and she took little Tazz on. Lisa was 14 yrs old at the time -and is now 23. She tethered him to her - otherwise he would hide behind furniture and you couldn't get him out without gloves and long sleeves! He was not potty trained and wouldn't go out the front door - because it was too wide open. He only would voluntarily go out the back door - it was shaded under big trees. She worked and worked with him, as did our whole family. We found out he loved old people, and was great with them. Every year we have had him we see improvement - this can be a very slow process!!! We have joked that by the time he dies he will be a normal dog!! Lisa did very well showing him - by the time she was a senior, she won grand champion Jr Showmanship with him at the MN state show for 4-H. Her breeder was so thrilled. She wanted to take the picture of Lisa and Tazz and wave it in the face of the 1st owners and say - "see what kind of dog you had!" Here is Tazz and Lisa, along with son Travis and his Min Pin Dino - 
So, we definitely believe in saving dogs who didn't have a good start in life. They are so, so very worth it! |
| We will definetely take it slow. Our boys are unusually mellow boys, but they are going to try to be extra mellow. We're just going to have them ignore him for a while and just toss treats his way when they have a chance but otherwise not look at him or try to go up to him or pet him.
Does the Gentle Leader hurt a dog in any way? How does it keep the dog from pulling? I am fearful of using it especially so soon with Chewie. Should we wait a while until he feels safer with us? He loves to go for walks and he lets my husband walk him but he pulls the whole way. My husband does the walk, pull, stop thing along the way. As you can see I loaded a thumbnail photo of Chewie on one of our walks along the Metolious River one rainy April afternoon. He actually leaned up against my husband and looked at me for the picture. He's a little wet! I'll have to learn how to add pics, plus we need to take more pics of Chewie. I'll try to add some to the My Photos tab. I'll have to add pics of Chewie's doggy mates. Madi our golden puppy and GiGi our toy yorkie. My kids are really enjoying reading everyones comments. Thanks |
| Sounds like you're on the right track!
Thank you so much for taking in this shy fellow. Plus, your pic has been approved. Seems like you've got it well figured out! |
| Thanks. I'm having lots of fun exploring this sight. Its also a little risky too...some things make me cry when I read about the sad stories. I'll keep letting everyone know how Chewie is doing. We're going on a hike up to some falls tomorrow so I hope we can get some good picks of Lindsay with Chewie.
Sydney |
| The gentle leader does not hurt a dog. It just feels annoying to them when they pull.
With the pulling, can you tell if he is excitedly trying to get somewhere or if he is running fearfully from something? Walking my Maggie, when I first got her, was extremely challenging because she was always hearing something she considered scary and trying to flee as quickly as she could. It is important not to soothe or coddle a fearful dog because that reinforces the idea that something out there is actually scary. Instead, be bright, happy cheerful so they learn from your own behavior that everything is ok. To get her used to street noise, I would sit out on the stoop with her to feed her, give her treats, etc., to make it a pleasant experience. When she was about to bolt (I was watching carefully), I would tell her to sit and I would be as calm and cheerful as possible. Sometimes, I had to put my foot on the leash to keep her in place. If she would stay calm, we could keep moving and get out of the noisy area. She caught onto this over a couple of months. After doing this for a while, she started to do it on her own as her automatic reaction when she heard a scary noise. This was much safer than running away. I had sort of forgotten about all of that because it really hasn't been an issue in a long time. If there is a noise you can avoid, then you can work on strategies to get the dog closer and closer over time. Metro Dog (also by Brian Kilcommons and Sarah Wilson, the authors of My Smart Puppy) has alot of advice for that situation. Good luck! |
| Personally, I think Chewbacca is a great name and I am always in favor of names that end in an 'ie' or 'y'--you smile, automatically when you say them.
Plus, when our Archie play-roughhouses with me, we say he sounds like a demented Wookie! Name's perfect, and thank heavens for your taking him on. Honestly, it sounds as though you've made wonderfu progress so far. It's just going to be a while. In addition to tossing some nice treats now and then, maybe your boys can occasionally roll a tennis ball across the floor or back and forth between their arms--slow, gentle. Not all dogs are food oriented--some prefer toys or petting instead. Archie and Sophie love toys and especially tennis balls--they are terrific. I use a gentle leader with Sophie because she is very headstrong. It was like a miracle! However, she does not like it at all and will avoid having her leash put on if she can. I understand the advice to avoid obedience classes for now--but you might see if there is a behaviorist around who can work one on one with you and Chewie or your daughter and Chewie, bare minimum so that you can get him to walk with good manners. It's safer for all concerned, and you will have more and better opportunities to exercise him--something that will help tremendously. As he begins to walk well, add your husband to the mix, maybe not taking the leash at first but just walking alongside your daughter, talking quietly as he would at home. When that goes well, one of the boys can--start with the quietest and again, don't have him take the leash, but just walk along companionably with you or his sister. Eventually, the leash could be transferred to a boy, during the walk, with no fuss or notice--just simply passing it over. Again--very slowly, over months, perhaps. \ |
tgir wrote: As he begins to walk well, add your husband to the mix, maybe not taking the leash at first but just walking alongside your daughter, talking quietly as he would at home. When that goes well, one of the boys can--start with the quietest and again, don't have him take the leash, but just walk along companionably with you or his sister. Eventually, the leash could be transferred to a boy, during the walk, with no fuss or notice--just simply passing it over. Again--very slowly, over months, perhaps.
\ I think that is wonderful advice for your dog to gain confidence in males again. Always hard when you don't know the cirumstances of what happened prior to you getting him. Slow steps, build trust slowly with males and for every step forward there is going to be a couple of steps backwards too. You will get there in the end, just takes time and patients to work through his past issues. Gentle leaders are what they say, gentle on the dog and much better then a choke chain. A godsend for people that have larger breeds as it is a gentle form of control while they are learning to walk nicely for you.
Best wishes it will happen, just takes time & patients. |
Chewie is so lucky to have found your family 
The only suggestion I might add is on obiedience training. Group training with all the dogs + 1-2 people per dog can be intimidating for well balanced, socialized dogs. Chewie may benefit from a few one-on-one training sessions before trying a group class.............Kathy |
| Well, I wanted to let you know how Chewy is doing. He is still very nervous, but he is very responsive to his new name! He does not pee around the boys anymore. Even though the boys still do not look at him or walk toward him, etc, they do toss treats on the floor for him to eat...and he does. They have even held doggy treats in their hands kind of behing themselves and Chewy comes up and eats from their hand. They also casually walk by his crate in the morning and reach behind and unlatch his crate to let him out. Now he even sits under the table at meals near them. So he is warming up. He is with our daughter Lindsay on a trip to visit her grandmother and grandma's husband. I told my mom to have Wes (her new husband) just sit quiet and relax on the couch when we came with Lindsay and Chewy. It worked. He sniffed Wes, but didn't run and hide or pee himself. He is nervous around their house pacing and doesn't go to Wes for attention, but he doesn't pee etc. He lets my mom handle him like letting him out or in the house. I suppose he may always be a nervous dog, but he is improving every day. |
What a wonderful, positive update!  It sounds to me like he's improving in leaps and bounds....although it may seem slow to you, since you are seeing the changes happen so gradually I'm really impressed with how your whole family has cooperated in helping this boy to be less fearful. We have an 8 year old, rescued girl with very similar issues, and now (3 years after we adopted her) people always comment on what a calm, unflappable dog she is!  She still has her moments, and will still bark at my (tall, male) employee sometimes, if he enters the room suddenly, but as soon as she realizes who it is, she now starts wagging her butt, and looking apologetic! Keep up the good work.  |
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