To smack or not to Smack, that is the question?
Is this polictical interference gone tooooo far? Are parents rights being slowly eroded from them? Are we raising a generation of uncontrolled, un-disiplined children? Like to know your views on this, all I can say is I am glad my children have grown up!!!! I did give them a rap on the backside when they were little and it did not hurt them. No drugs, no drinking problems, got through the teenage years without too much drama. If you are not allowed to smack then how do you have a discussion with a little one and talk reason into them, like "now sweetheart, don't stick that knife into the electrical socket or don't touch the stove as you migh burn yourself!!!" Sheesh so much interference in family life.  |
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lisaoes wrote: .....Is this polictical interference gone tooooo far?
Are parents rights being slowly eroded from them? Are we raising a generation of uncontrolled, un-disiplined children?......... YES to all three questions! But, people just sit by and let it happen. That's what I don't understand. PROTEST it! I wish more people here would stand up to our government on many issues, but I think its just too easy to "let them do the work", regardless of the consequences. But, one day we'll pay for making that choice, we'll no longer have the "right" to make any "choices". |
| Someday will our government(s) take charge of all the children, their housing and education, and dress them in nice brown shirts... |
Very volatile subject!!! Well, you asked! 
lisaoes wrote: Here in Australia the government is about to pass legislation banning parents from smacking children.
Is this polictical interference gone tooooo far? Are parents rights being slowly eroded from them? Are we raising a generation of uncontrolled, un-disiplined children? Sheesh so much interference in family life. What about the children's rights? I wish more places would follow suit. I don't believe in hitting at all...children, spouses, pets, any of them. Tapping, pushing, slapping, grabbing, none of it. I have never raised a hand to my kids. Don and I both agreed that it is not what we would use to guide our children through their developemental years. There are other ways of communicating to children then force and intimidation. Canada is very strict on what is acceptable and what isn't, but there is still a loophole of "using reasonable force" that folks can slide through. I wish they would close it. |
| I hardly ever spank my boys, but they do get them sometimes when they do something dangerous or continuously. Time outs just don't work for some kids, redirecting doesn't work, 123 Magic doesn't... What's going to happen with those kids? Are they just going to be uncontrollable and unruly?
Luckily, with Brandon, time outs work best for him right now. A spanking doesn't phase him a bit (he has a VERY high pain tolerance), so making him stand with his nose on the wall works a ton better than spankings for him. He thinks it's torture to be in time-out and straightens up quick! lol Jake...well, honestlly, he hardly ever gets into trouble at home. I can't even tell you when the last time he has been bad here. They do spank at his school though. I got a ton of spankings growing up (stubborn child, lol), and I grew up just fine. I hardly ever caused my parents any trouble as I got older (was pretty much the perfect teenager for them). I don't see any problem with them as long as you aren't leaving bruises or abusive. |
| Neither of my children were ever spanked. I believe that hitting children teaches them that it is okay to use violence and physical force to get what you what. My children were well disciplined without being hit. I sometimes think they would have preferred a quick spanking to some of the punishments we use (grounding losing privileges, losing allowance et).
BUT, neither do I believe that the Government should be telling parents how to raise their children. To spank or not to spank should be an individual decision and parents should have the freedom to make that decision. |
| I think the government needs to stay out of the child rearing business. They should have their hands full governing the country! By the way, you should see how some kids act in school. You can almost pick out with certainty which kids have structure and discipline in their homes and which ones don't. |
Ron wrote: Someday will our government(s) take charge of all the children, their housing and education, and dress them in nice brown shirts...
Somewhat off topic, but I think they're already doing that in the form of welfare and food stamps. They just have to find another approach to gain control of those that don't get "caught up" in their system. One, that instead of helping people get out of poverty, keeps them there, under government control. If mom and dad don't follow the rules, they get spanked (punished) and loose the benefits necessary for their children, and government knows that. |
| If the government feels they must get into this area, teach parents alternative methods instead of outlawing this one method. More education, less legislation.
Big Brother is getting just gets bigger......when will someone break the bubble? |
| hm... maybe it is just a step towards cracking down on child abuse. I think physical abuse in homes is a huge problem, people think that just because they have a child means they get to infringe on the kids right to not be hit. |
JakobandBrandonsmom wrote: They do spank at his school though.
Is that legal where you live? If that happened around here, the teacher would be gone so quickly! |
Stacy wrote: JakobandBrandonsmom wrote: They do spank at his school though. Is that legal where you live? If that happened around here, the teacher would be gone so quickly! Yep, perfectly legal. The teacher doesn't spank though; the principal does. |
| I am totally for spankings. The rule when I lived in tx was... you can spank your kids open handed. Police won't arrest your parents for a mark on your leg, etc if it's just a hand print.
I'm all for that. I think it's a fair. I plan on spanking my lil boy when he needs it. Physical abuse here in Alaska is HUGE. I think the largest in any state. |
Joahaeyo wrote: I plan on spanking my lil boy when he needs it.
Wow. This makes me sad when someone is already "planning" to hit their defenseless child. Poor little mite. |
Yes. It was well discussed before we even had a baby. I plan on using time-outs as well, but I see nothing wrong with a swat on the rear. Most of the time it doesn't even hurt them. Toddlers cry because they're shocked, embarrassed, and sad they did it. I don't plan on beating him. Anyway, to each their own.  There's definitely no reason to feel bad for this well taken care of boy. |
| Why can't I smack my wife when I think she's been a bad wife?
It probably wouldn't hurt her (I would be sure not to leave any marks) it would just embarrass her, and hopefully shock her into submission. Then again if she is about to walk in front of a bus, I'll probably just softly remind her that what she is doing disappoints hubby, and she should just sit right down and think about what she is doing and how she could do better in the future. |
BTW, I'm not taking a position one way or the other.... 
I just love creating "food for thought." |
| Personally, there are three things that I never discuss with other.
1. Religion 2. Politics 3. How other raise their children |
| What about the politics of how people choose to raise their children religiously?
Can we discuss my wife beating and/or timeouts? |
| I have a head cold Ron.. stop messing with my head.. It's foggy in there enough already |
Ron wrote: What about the politics of how people choose to raise their children religiously?
Can we discuss my wife beating and/or timeouts? I'd love to discuss your wife beating. Although is it really beating if you don't leave marks? Perhaps we should just call it your wife humiliation. |
Ron wrote: Can we discuss my wife beating and/or timeouts?
It can go both ways Ron, times are a changing!!, Hubby abuse is on it's way up too in domestic problems. Women are more common with domestic abuse, but it is happening in reversal too. So careful or you might get a smack from your other half
To smack or not too smack is not really the question, each to their own and how they raise there own families, I suppose the question is, is there too much political interferences in raising children. Parents must be so confused and running scared at what to do with too much regulations on everyday things in life. Heck one kid got told to remove a lemonade stand out the front of there house in case someone got hurt. Play parks cope so much red tape in case a child falls off a slide and hurts themselves, some play parks take away all the equipment as too much red tape to keep them there. So on and So on and So on it goes, soon you may need permission to have children, a license to let them go out and explore and play, heck things are getting ridiculous with all these political correctness nuts. A society of litigations and children wrapped in cottonwool in the making and it spoils it for all.  Just being a family is hard work now-a-days  I am glad I had a carefree childhood and so did my children. We ran wild, played hard and yes even the odd broken bone, but we survived and learnt from just being able to be a kid.  |
Joahaeyo wrote: There's definitely no reason to feel bad for this well taken care of boy.
Oh, I am sure he is well loved and well taken care of.
Hey...I was fully prepared to do "the norm" when I had kids. But after I actually had kids, and I got more informed, we changed our approach, and no longer had the desire to go that route. Maybe your little fellow will be such a good boy, and you will raise him so well he may go without! |
| I am still dumbfounded that spanking is allowed in Mississippi schools.
lisaoes wrote: soon you may need permission to have children
I think that would be a GREAT idea, but it would be so difficult to define what constitutes a good parent. Isn't there some law/rule in China that they can only have one kid? |
Stacy wrote: I am still dumbfounded that spanking is allowed in Mississippi schools.
It's allowed in a lot of schools in the US still. |
mouthypf wrote: lisaoes wrote: .....Is this polictical interference gone tooooo far? Are parents rights being slowly eroded from them? Are we raising a generation of uncontrolled, un-disiplined children?......... YES to all three questions! But, people just sit by and let it happen. That's what I don't understand. PROTEST it! I wish more people here would stand up to our government on many issues, but I think its just too easy to "let them do the work", regardless of the consequences. But, one day we'll pay for making that choice, we'll no longer have the "right" to make any "choices". I agree with this ONE HUNDRED and one percent ... |
JakobandBrandonsmom wrote: Stacy wrote: I am still dumbfounded that spanking is allowed in Mississippi schools. It's allowed in a lot of schools in the US still. IN SCHOOLS !!! now i think that might be a little ... extream |
Stacy wrote: I am still dumbfounded that spanking is allowed in Mississippi schools.
lisaoes wrote: soon you may need permission to have children I think that would be a GREAT idea, but it would be so difficult to define what constitutes a good parent. Isn't there some law/rule in China that they can only have one kid? I'm also dumbfounded that spanking is used at schools. In Canada (or at least, in Ontario), teachers are obligated to contact child services if a child tells them they've been spanked at home. I don't think it's illegal, but child services just makes sure that it isn't an abusive situation. I don't have kids yet, and I have certainly had those moments where I think... "those people should not be allowed to reproduce!", but that would be such an infringment on people's rights, it'll never happen. I think the reason they can only have 1 child in China is due to overpopulation. This is why there are so many chinese girls available for adoption.... because so many people want their 1 child to be a boy. Ron. You make me laugh. |
ButtersStotch wrote: Ron wrote: What about the politics of how people choose to raise their children religiously? Can we discuss my wife beating and/or timeouts? I'd love to discuss your wife beating. Although is it really beating if you don't leave marks? Perhaps we should just call it your wife humiliation. Are there paddles or riding crops involved? Ooops - that's a different website
But seriously - I don't think the government should pass any more laws until they can enforce the laws they already have. There are laws against child abuse. And yet, children die on a regular basis because the systems we have in place are underfunded and don't protect them. Let's use the money to crack down on people who beat their children so hard that they wind up in the hospital. Or keep their children in cages. Or engage their children in drug dealing and prostitution. We barely have the resources to protect these children who are highly at risk. Do you want scarce resources diverted because some suburban mom spanked her daughter for misbehaving on the way to soccer or ballet? I don't. |
| my husband comes up with the best punishment for the kids when they misbehave or fight with one another.....they have to hold hands and sing as loud as they can "You are my sunshine" and then they have to say sorry to each other and to us and then hug...by the time they are finished singing they forgot what they are fighting about. |
WizardMerlin wrote: my husband comes up with the best punishment for the kids when they misbehave or fight with one another.....they have to hold hands and sing as loud as they can "You are my sunshine" and then they have to say sorry to each other and to us and then hug...by the time they are finished singing they forgot what they are fighting about.
how old are your kids ? |
My kids now are 13,12,10 and 8,...but this punishment has been in effect at our home for years.   |
WizardMerlin wrote: my husband comes up with the best punishment for the kids when they misbehave or fight with one another.....they have to hold hands and sing as loud as they can "You are my sunshine" and then they have to say sorry to each other and to us and then hug...by the time they are finished singing they forgot what they are fighting about.
future snipers.... |
Anonymous wrote: WizardMerlin wrote: my husband comes up with the best punishment for the kids when they misbehave or fight with one another.....they have to hold hands and sing as loud as they can "You are my sunshine" and then they have to say sorry to each other and to us and then hug...by the time they are finished singing they forgot what they are fighting about. future snipers.... Lol. |
Anonymous wrote: WizardMerlin wrote: my husband comes up with the best punishment for the kids when they misbehave or fight with one another.....they have to hold hands and sing as loud as they can "You are my sunshine" and then they have to say sorry to each other and to us and then hug...by the time they are finished singing they forgot what they are fighting about. future snipers.... |
| ? I don't get it? |
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